I play piano and organ (along with French horn, trumpet, handbells, a bit of guitar, etc.), and I love music, especially Broadway musicals. Beethoven is my hero and role model. I'm not happy unless I'm involved with kids in some capacity, though I'm not too interested in having my own. I'm not terribly athletic, but I will do almost anything just to be able to say I've done it. I have a thing about being able to prove I'm tough, so if I'm given a challenge I'll do everything I can to overcome it (even if it's something like eating an anchovy...I hate sea food, heh).
I also have had major depression for eight years, including a past of self-injury. I have some pretty severe scars on my arms that are obviously from self-injury. I need someone happy to balance out my life, who can understand my problems but help me see the positive side to things. I will most likely struggle with mental health issues for the rest of my life, and I need someone who can handle that.
As for what I'm looking for: I hate cooking, I have a cat, and text-speak makes me want to gouge my eyes out with rusty sporks (though I'm completely okay with emoticons). I WILL complain about period pains and you WILL empathize. Willingness to grow facial hair is a definite bonus.
I'm really new to this whole online dating thing, and to be honest I've never even been on a date, much less had a boyfriend. So just know that I'm a complete idiot when it comes to relationships XD
I'd love to hear from you if anything I've said sounds interesting. I'm super lonely, been wanting a relationship for a while but I'm so socially awkward that it's just not happening naturally. So here I am, doing something I swore I'd never do, hoping something good will come from it :)
Movies: The ones I can watch over and over are All of Me with Steve Martin and Lily Tomlin; Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland; Hello, Dolly; National Treasure; Tangled; The Incredibles; Mamma Mia; and all of the Harry Potter movies (I'm totally a Harry Potter geek). I'll watch pretty much anything besides war movies and westerns. Lately I've taken to psychological horror/thriller movies, especially ones about serial killers, or the ones that just mess with your head (not so much the slasher type).
Shows: Assuming this means TV shows, the best show in the world is Castle, because one of the main characters is a writer and I feel like an insider cuz I get all his writer jokes, and because the characters are amazing. I also watch Body of Proof, Wipeout, Mythbusters, The Jetsons, SpongeBob, The Fairly Oddparents, 48 Hours Mystery, Desperate Housewives, Grey's Anatomy, Face Off...my tastes are pretty diverse :P Oh oh oh and Invader Zim! Best cartoon EVAR.
Music: Broadway, baby! I love musicals. My stand-out favorites are Evita, Phantom of the Opera, and Les Mis. I love the Broadway version of Lion King way better than the movie. Other than that I mostly listen to pop/rock, English or Spanish, and in certain moods I like jazz. Anything but country -_-
Food: Potatoes! I could spend my entire life eating potatoes. And lasagna has kind of become a thing, there's a story behind it. I can manage some Chinese but mostly I'm an all-American cheeseburger girl. Oh and Italian is good too.
Music. Whether playing it or listening to it, it always moves me emotionally. When I don't have access to a piano it kills me and I become obsessed with finding one, and then I'll just play and play for hours. Sometimes I go to church just for the music and leave before the sermon, haha. And I'll go out of my way to see someone brilliant perform.
My little brother. He's 4.5 years younger than me and he's my best friend. We can talk about anything and we have a lot of fun together. Our main bonding thing is to go to the dollar store, buy a ton of candy, and sneak it into the movies. We watch a *lot* of movies together. After a rather tumultuous relationship with him growing up, I treasure every moment now that we have such an awesome bond.
Kids. I get (even more) depressed if I don't have contact with kids on a regular basis. They always make me so happy. I love watching children learn and grow up. I love playing with them, hearing their stories and what comes out of their imaginations. Being with kids forces me to be okay because I have to stop wallowing in self-pity and think about someone else. And, after many, many years of taking care of kids, it's something I feel very confident in, both in the way of emotionally connecting to kids and managing crises. I'm currently working four different part-time jobs, and all of them involve kids XD I'm addicted to children. In the not-creepy way.
Writing. If I didn't have my writing I don't know what I'd do. For a lot of people, writing is "cathartic" or a way to work through their angst or whatever, but for me it's different. For me, the thing I love about writing is that I get to create something completely new, and I get to immerse myself in that world and get away from real life for a bit. When I'm writing novels, I know each character all the way through, and I'm good at putting myself in their positions and writing accurately. When I write poems, though a lot of them are about depressing or tragic things, I still think that poetry can take something horrible and make it beautiful. Out of all types of literature, I think poetry says the most with the fewest words, so it's a challenge, and incredibly satisfying when I create something I'm happy with.
My church. Not just any church, *my* church. It's the church I grew up in, and in my early college years when I had empty time during the day I would stay there and do homework. I was actually given my own desk for a while, and my name was added to the 'in and out' board for employees :) I became staff when I was thirteen as the kid's choir accompanist, and I'm heavily involved with the children's ministry, as well as music. I love the building itself; it's 125 years old, and I like to go there when there aren't many people there and practice piano in the sanctuary in the light of the stained-glass windows, or wander around trying to get up into the towers and other places I'm not supposed to go ;) I just figured out how to get onto the roof so that was exciting. I know the building inside out, and with my love of the building as well as the staff who work there during the week and the people I've known all my life on Sunday mornings, my church really is a second home to me.
I can't sleep without my "rag," as my old roommate called it, which is just the middle third of an old cloth diaper :blush:
Umm also I shave my arms? Lots of people find that weird but I've been doing it since I was thirteen so I'm pretty sure it's a habit that's staying for good.
You will grow an epic mustache, since I can't.
You can accept that I have pretty major mental illness and think you can handle it. I have good days when I can seem relatively carefree, but I also have days where I can't get myself to get out of bed. So if the good outweighs the bad...I guess we'll see, haha.