Failing to bite my tongue at times
Finding that "spot" ;)
History and random facts. Jeopardy here I come.
Mastering the snooze button but still getting to work on time.
Personality wise. Im funny, but more of a George Carlin type of funny. You know, truthfully funny. Not a make stuff up kind of jokester.
Music: ALL KINDS. I might go from Jay Z's Public Announcement right into The Doobie Brothers, then make a left turn over to Hall & Oates then get out of my car at the stoplight to kiss Taylor Swift on the cheek, then hitch a ride with Nas on the way to catch Santana in concert.
Shows: Shark Tank, Top Chef, Hell's Kitchen (yes I love Gordon Ramsay), True Detective, Game of Thrones, Orange Is the New Black, Anything Law & Order, and Nat Geo.. yes that's right Nat 'effing Geo.
The 24 hour news cycle
Peanut Butter Cups
More oranges. Yes I know that's seven things. But I'm serious about the oranges. Shit who knows, maybe sex and oranges together somehow.
All sorts of things. Deep thoughts, not so deep thoughts. Why can't cats run up and greet you with the enthusiasm of a dog. Is there some kind of Nate Silver algorithm to determine someones chances of being born here in the US. Yeah, we won the Geography Lottery but I could seriously spend the rest of my life living 3-5 years in a country then off to the next and the next.
You should NOT message me if...
1. You just want online attention. Yes there's a lot of you out there that just continuously want dudes to write you. If you've read my profile and write me, you must be interested. If not, lets not waste each others time. I'm pretty good at sniffing out someone that just wants to play games... and yes I know I'm not the only dude you're probably talking to on here, and I don't care.. but some of you act like we don't know this lol...
2. You have "God" listed somewhere in the first few sentence of your profile. I'm sorry but I don't think I'd get along with Jesus freaks, bible thumpers and the likes. There is a simple mindedness that I come to find is pretty common with most of these people. They don't want to believe this about themselves but anyone who lacks the ability to critically think and question things is simply someone I cannot waste my time with.
3. The first sentence starts off with "I have a degree in x". Degrees... I have one, you have one, lots of us have one. Unless you are in med school or majored in some kind of engineering chances are your degree wasn't that hard to get (mine wasn't, I admit that), College isn't that hard for most people...so whats the point in feeling the need to make that the FIRST thing you want to say about yourself in your profile? Figured you might have something more interesting to say about yourself in the first couple of sentences...
4. If your main profile picture is you at the gun range firing your AR-15 assault rifle. While I don't have an issue with guns at all I've come to find that most chicks with profile pics of them at the range look like they could bench press a bail of hay and might have had facial hair at some point. Every once in a blue moon you find a sexy woman who happens to be holding a gun in her profile but let's not kid ourselves, we ARE in the midwest/south, Sexy and Gun co-existing in a profile pic here are pretty rare. Less time at the range, more time at the beauty salon and dentist.
5. Don't be insecure. I've noticed a trend on here. The more attractive, SANE, got her shit together, and less baggage a woman has on this site the more she seems to be open to having fun, lettings things play out naturally, less wishy washy, and actually doesn't scare men off. These women are secure.
On the flip side, the more baggage some women have on here, tons of kids, weight from the kids, job vs career, and no direction in life are usually the ones who in their very first paragraph pretty much broadcast to the world they want someone to "complete" them, wifey them, be the thing that takes all their personal insecurites away that they refuse to admit they have. Don't be this woman, really. When you project this right away you scare men off then bitch that there's no good men, which is a cop-out statement.
6. Dont be batshit crazy. Contrary to the stigma some of you have placed on men when it comes to dating sites the truth is the level of batshit crazy is about a 50/50 split between men and women.
NOW.. ONTO THE GOOD STUFF! You SHOULD message me IF...
You're intrigued. Aren't scared off that I might be a cross between Christian Grey and a teddy bear. You're smart enough to pick up what I'm putting down. Maybe you like a man to squeeze your ass but still respect you while doing so. You understand that if it's raining all day Saturday I might just want to stay in bed and watch good movies, but you know you're invited without asking. You're bored (but not boring) and want something to do... oh and yes this isn't my only picture. If you're interested write me, and please don't be batshit crazy.... Someone please prove to me that the gene pool in this part of the country is bigger than I suspect it is...