44Manhattan, United States
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My self-summary
Yikes the thought of writing a "self-summary" makes my skin crawl but here goes: Lifetime New Yorker wondering if escape is possible. Dry-humored, awkward wise-ass, cultural omnivore, avid reader, washed-up guitar player, ambivalent gentrifier, closet romantic, endearing curmudgeon, low-information voter, sugar-packet thief, cat person.
What I’m doing with my life
Did my mom write these questions? Um... walking and thinking, being way too nice a guy in a city that needs a giant wedgie, procrastinating and occasionally writing, reading a lot of books and watching a lot of movies, avoiding being reduced to a cultural stereotype...
I’m really good at
Over-analyzing shit, undercutting myself and then regretting it later, turning half-truths into banality-free fiction, giving the impression that I'm a functioning adult, self-deprecation, turning the other cheek, aimless city wandering, flossing every day, eating the rest of your fries, righteous anger, bullshit detection, daydreaming.
The first things people usually notice about me
Hmm. This is difficult to answer as I unfortunately cannot read minds. Besides, what other people notice about me is none of my business.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Good grief I'm going to have a hard time keeping this brief.

Books: Graham Greene, Raymond Chandler, James M. Cain, John Cheever, Bernard Malamud, Raymond Carver, Richard Yates, Edna O'Brien, Alice Munro, Philip Roth. Frederick Exley's A Fan's Notes! Recent stuff if you ask me.

Movies: Argh too many... His Girl Friday, The Awful Truth, Out of the Past, In a Lonely Place, Sweet Smell of Success, All About Eve, North By Northwest, Man Who Shot Liberty Valance, Shoot the Piano Player, Army of Shadows... The Conformist, Broadway Danny Rose, After Hours, This Is Spinal Tap, Blue Velvet, In The Mood For Love, You Can Count On Me, Squid and the Whale...

Music: Muddy Waters, Howlin' Wolf, Chuck Berry, Buddy Holly, Bo Diddley, Rolling Stones, James Brown, Beatles, Otis Redding, Dylan, The Kinks, Marvin Gaye, Velvet Underground, Creedence, Modern Lovers, Bowie, Curtis Mayfield, Television, Iggy, Joy Division, Ramones, Prince, Replacements, Nirvana...
My opinion of most Indie Rock: yawn.

TV: Mad Men, UK Office, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Veep, Parks and Rec, Simpsons (old ones), Get Smart, The Odd Couple, Batman (1960s), Cheers (Diane years), The Honeymooners...

Food: Just about everything as long as it doesn't have celery.
Six things I could never do without
Something to read, coffee, lip balm, public radio, orange seltzer, running daily, more coffee, beer, see above music.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
If it's too early to have a drink, all the stories I'm too lazy to write, the foreign country Barack Obama was REALLY born in (just kidding), how the fuck I'm going to find the time to listen to all these podcasts, assassinating Trump Godfather Part 2 style, changing my identity and moving somewhere else, why Just Kids is a favorite in every OKC profile (Hey I mostly liked it, but let's just say I have issues with Patti), the "old" New York, mass extinction, what I should have said to the guy who almost ran me over with his bike, women, the future, death.
On a typical Friday night I am
Avoiding where the guys wearing sandals/shorts/backwards baseball caps are going. Also avoiding where the beards/tattoos/nerd glasses guys are going.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Everything you've just read is private enough, pilgrim.
You should message me if
You're a healthy balance of salty and sweet. And maybe slightly bitter.
You could care less about Game of Thrones.
You think of Brooklyn as a place and not a lifestyle.
In your profile you don't refer to yourself as a (fill in the blank) girl.
You don't wear yoga pants and pink sneakers.
This may sound off-putting, but if you're self-obsessed, solipsistic, and like to dominate conversations by talking about yourself incessantly, I am not the guy for you.
You're Elena Ferrante.
The two of us