44Manhattan, United States
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My self-summary
Yikes the thought of writing a "self-summary" makes my skin crawl. Lifetime New Yorker wondering if escape is possible. Dry-humored, cultural omnivore, avid reader, ambivalent gentrifier, closet romantic, endearing curmudgeon, low-information voter, cat person.
What I’m doing with my life
Did my mom write these questions? Um... working for the fake news industrial complex, reading a lot of books and watching a lot of movies, avoiding being reduced to a cultural stereotype...
I’m really good at
Over-analyzing shit, undercutting myself to boost you up and then regretting it later, turning half-truths into delightful stories, giving the impression that I'm a functioning adult, self-deprecation, turning the other cheek, aimless wandering, flossing every day, eating the rest of your fries, righteous anger, bullshit detection, daydreaming.
The first things people usually notice about me
Hmm. This is difficult to answer as I unfortunately cannot read minds.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Good grief I'm going to have a hard time keeping this brief.

Books: Graham Greene, Raymond Chandler, James M. Cain, John Cheever, Bernard Malamud, Raymond Carver, Richard Yates, Edna O'Brien, Alice Munro, Philip Roth. Frederick Exley's A Fan's Notes!

Movies: Argh too many... His Girl Friday, The Awful Truth, Out of the Past, In a Lonely Place, Sweet Smell of Success, All About Eve, North By Northwest, Man Who Shot Liberty Valance, Shoot the Piano Player, Army of Shadows... The Godfather, Broadway Danny Rose, After Hours, This Is Spinal Tap, In The Mood For Love, You Can Count On Me, Squid and the Whale...

Music: Muddy Waters, Howlin' Wolf, Chuck Berry, Buddy Holly, Bo Diddley, Rolling Stones, James Brown, Beatles, Otis Redding, Dylan, Motown, Stax, The Kinks, Marvin Gaye, Velvet Underground, Creedence, Modern Lovers, Bowie, Curtis Mayfield, Television, Iggy, Joy Division, Ramones, Prince...
My opinion of most Indie Rock: yawn.

TV: Mad Men, UK Office, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Parks and Rec, Simpsons (old ones), Get Smart, The Odd Couple, Batman (1960s), Cheers (Diane years), The Honeymooners...

Food: Just about everything as long as it doesn't have celery.
Six things I could never do without
Something to read, coffee, lip balm, public radio, running daily, more coffee, beer, see above music.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
If it's too early to have a drink, the foreign country Barack Obama was REALLY born in (just kidding), how the fuck I'm going to find the time to listen to all these podcasts, assassinating Donald Trump Godfather Part 2 style, the story I'm working on and whether I'll actually write it, changing my identity and moving somewhere else, whether women on this site who love "Just Kids" own a Patti Smith album (don't bother, she's overrated), the "old" New York, mass extinction, what I should have said to the guy who almost ran me over with his bike, women, the future, death.
On a typical Friday night I am
Most likely at work, if not I'm avoiding where the guys wearing sandals/shorts/backwards baseball caps are going. Also avoiding where the beards/tattoos/nerd glasses guys are going.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Everything you've just read is private enough, pilgrim.
You should message me if
You're a healthy balance of salty and sweet. And maybe slightly bitter.
You could care less about Game of Thrones.
You think of Brooklyn as a place and not a lifestyle.
You don't wear yoga pants and pink sneakers.
This may sound off-putting, but if you're self-obsessed, solipsistic, and like to dominate conversations by talking about yourself incessantly, I am not the guy for you.
You're Elena Ferrante.
The two of us