I have been off of here for over a year but decided to try again, hopefully, eventually something will work. I have been back in Asheville for almost 5 years now and I truly hope to find someone that will make me smile every day. I have a beautiful daughter that is 9 years old and she is my life priority. She is in Georgia with her Mom but is here often and during her school breaks.
After reactivating my profile I began thinking about this whole adventure. I have been on and off of online dating sites since my divorce in 2010. I have had relationships, some were great, some lasted over a year, but what is it that has me back here?
I see several of the same profiles from over a year ago when I left and deactivated my account. What is it that we are not finding? I am a positive person, and do not say negative things in my profile to show that, but apparently that is not drawing the person I am looking for or reaching the right people. So the question is, what needs to change?
I read a profile my first day back and the lovely lady was talking about how she always shows appreciation to her significant other through thanking them and affirming them. This reminded me of the book on the 5 love languages. (Words of Affirmation, Physical Touch, Quality Time, Acts of Service and Giving or Receiving Gifts).
I read it 15 years ago while married and determined that I feel loved and rewarded through words of affirmation. This book really reached me and made perfect sense. We all need to find the person that speaks the language that we need to hear. Ask yourself how you show someone that you care, and how do you want them to show you that they care. Figuring this out on here would be very helpful.
This is why I do not do well with hard sarcastic tones of voice, or people who speak in a condescending tone. I need positivity not sarcasm to feel appreciated. It is just who I am. So I ask that if you decide to message me, tell me how you think you show and receive love. This does not mean I expect someone to express love, just tell me what you think your language is, it will help to know if we are compatible.
Addendum: This does not mean that my feelings are easily hurt, or that I cannot take a joke. It means that I prefer someone who does not speak in negative and hateful tones, rather someone who is positive and uplifting and speaks appreciatively.
~~Now on to more about me and what I enjoy:
I have recently made my fitness a huge priority and have lost 40 lbs in the last year and my goal is to lose at least another 50 this year. I believe in myself so I know I can do this. I am focusing on eating better and have been hiking/ walking a lot. I recently did a 10k and have a weekly 25 mile goal. I have a long way to go to meet my destination but have set small attainable goals to help keep me motivated. I have a Biltmore Pass and go there to walk regularly, it would be great to have someone who would be willing to go and walk 3 to 5 miles with me a few times a week. So even though I am a bigger guy, I am not sedentary, I am active and go often. I do not see other people my size out hiking when I go to waterfalls, so I know I am more active than most people my size. I will get back to a better weight soon :-)
I have a few hobbies that I greatly enjoy and would love to find someone who enjoys the same things or someone that can introduce me to other new things as well.
*I love to hike, especially to waterfalls, and will have my Canon in tow. I am very adventurous, I get out and go all the time, finding waterfalls, driving the parkway, driving the Forest Service Roads off of the parkway etc. I go to the Southern Highlands a lot, Brevard, Rosman, Lake Toxaway, Cashiers, Highlands etc. I love hiking in Panthertown Valley and want to explore some of the waterfalls in the Little Canada area above the Valley. I get up for sunrise photos often, and am always watching the sky to see if I need to shoot the sunset. Sound like fun? Maybe you can join me.
*My other favorite thing is my camera~~ I love photography! I spend quite a bit of time photographing our beautiful mountains and waterfalls. I currently have my photography in art galleries and in shops in the region and have my own website where I sell my work too. Locally I have been selling my prints at the Taligate Markets. If you want to see my work send me a message and I will give you my website.
I enjoy visiting art galleries, it can be inspiring for me to see others work. I also enjoy wandering around antique shops and seeing what I can find.
I visit the Biltmore Estate often, I like to wander the grounds, hiking on the trails, or in the Conservatory and of course the house.
I am a bit of a movie buff and have been known to quote movies from time to time. Many life situations remind me of movies and I find myself quoting or talking about them when they come up.
I also love to cook, especially on my grill. I like to cook and eat healthy typically chicken or fish. I do enjoy a good beer, but am not interested in getting drunk, and you should be similar. I will typically have one or two with dinner at a restaurant or with friends.
I am looking for people that are willing to be spontaneous and get together when time allows, not planning two weeks in advance. Mostly I want to meet fun people and build on the friendships we will make.
Please note: I have made a huge step in my life to follow a dream and start my own business selling my photography. It can be challenging at times but I work hard and have been successful enough to live off of my art. There is not a lot of excess yet, but I will continue to push and improve my business. I state this so you understand that sometimes funds are tight, I need someone to stick by me even when the bad months happen, but I am working on preventing those in the future.
I also love Shakespeare and medieval lit.
I am a bit of a movie buff, love epic films like Lord of the Rings, Narnia, Braveheart etc. Field of Dreams is one of my favorites (history of baseball). Really love Secondhand Lions!! Like Guy Ritchie films Snatch and Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, also Monty Python Holy Grail.
Enjoy super hero / comic movies especially the Marvel Avengers movies. Grew up a Star Wars kid, interested to see what Disney can do in 2015 with Episode 7.
Too many more to mention for now.
I do not like TV shows that much. There are a few things that I like such as The Walking Dead and Bates Motel. I was always a Survivor Fan and like Criminal Minds too, but if I am watching it is typically sports, golf, baseball, college football or UFC.
Musically, I have been told that I have a pensive taste in music. Mostly deep and thought provoking songs. I like Mumford & Sons, Lumineers, Us and Our Daughters, Israel Kamakawiwo'ole, Bob Marley, Jack Johnson, Jason Mraz, but also enjoy talented musicians more than just popular stuff. I love to relax to classical sometimes as well and Celtic or other international music. I also like Cold Play, One Republic, Linkin Park, The Script, Paramore, Evanescence, even a littel Eminem.
I love spicy food, anything cajun, sushi, and East Village Grille!!
A huge part of my recovering fitness is what I eat. I do like to eat out and prefer locally owned restaurants, I like White Duck, Chai Pani, Mela, Zen Sushi, Marco's Pizza, Piazza, Local Joint, The Junction, Mayfel's, Tupelo Honey and on and on.
I am working hard on sticking with healthier options all the time, including getting off of any processed foods, but it is a work in process.
my golf clubs
Beautiful Scenery to photograph
How to market my business more and make it the success that I know it can be.
I know my profile may read "serious relationship" I eventually want that, but am open to other things as well. I am not rushing into anything. If we click and we both want to move forward, wonderful. But if you are not looking for that please don't rule me out. I have had a few say that to me, so I just wanted to clarify.
You are interested developing a true close friend and possibly more.
You enjoy hiking and exploring, and appreciate art and photography.
You will not judge a small business owner who puts most of his extra resources back into his business.
You are actually interested in meeting, not months of messages going back and forth.
You greatly enjoy good conversation
You want to be around someone who will treat you well, and will give you as much or as little attention as you would like.
You like to have lots of fun
Please be somewhat close to Asheville or willing to come to the Mountains to visit.
Please respect the English language enough to not use "text talk". The number 2 should not replace to or too, b4 is not before, u is not you etc.