37Austin, United States
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My self-summary
I've got 99 problems, and being a decaying organism that's born to die in a society run by money that I cannot escape from is one of them.
What I’m doing with my life
Staring into the void.
Cuddling with my dog.
Trying to maintain my cool exterior.
I’m really good at
Stuff & things
Remembering every lyric to 80s/90s one hit wonders that I haven't heard in ten years
Being awkward
The first things people usually notice about me
I have long, luscious, cartoon princess eyelashes.

Oh, and I'm hella fat, so if you're not into it, jog on.

ig: shmemson
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
BOOKS: I'll read anything I can get my hands on. I'm a huge fan of Love & Rockets by Gilbert & Jaime Hernandez, the Game of Thrones series, Vonnegut, Kate Beaton, Katherine Dunn, Stephen King, Michael Chabon, Junot Diaz, Tom Robbins, Bradbury, Cormac McCarthy, Raymond Chandler, Andrew Vachss, Edward Gorey, etc.

MOVIES: Wet Hot American Summer!!! Back to the Future, Hot Rod, The Blues Brothers, Clue, Real Genius, Raising Arizona, The Jerk, Better Off Dead, Tapeheads, The Ladies Man, Let The Right One In, Revenge of the Nerds, The Big Lebowski, Black Dynamite, Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, Role Models, the collected works of John Waters, David Lynch, Wes Anderson. I firmly believe that Uncle Buck is the greatest movie of all time, and also that The Godfather is overrated garbage.

MUSIC: Currently OBSESSED with Beach House. Like, I cannot stop listening to them. The Clash, The Misfits, The Cure, Nick Cave, Neutral Milk Hotel, Roxy Music, Brian Eno, 70s Glam, 60s girl groups, Siouxsie, Sleater-Kinney, Hall & Oates, PJ Harvey, Little Richard, Motown, The Smiths, Arcade Fire, Black Lips, King Khan & BBQ, The Thermals, Le Tigre, Bikini Kill, Janet Jackson, Taylor Dane, Bonnie Tyler, Salt n Pepa, anything with surf guitar, 80s synthpop, the collective bands of Jack White, lo-fi, hi-fi, sideways-fi, pretty much. I do have a weakness for certain pop hooks.

TV: X-Files, The State, The Adventures of Pete & Pete, Twin Peaks, Spaced, Garth Marengi's Darkplace, The Wire, The Eric Andre Show, Parks & Rec, Brooklyn 99, Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, Boardwalk Empire, Jimmy Fallon, 30 Rock, Community, Anthony Bourdain, Conan, Daily Show & Colbert, Archer, Venture Bros, The Heart She Holler, and so on.

PODCASTS: Comedy Bang Bang, Welcome To Night Vale, How Did This Get Made, WTF, Mike And Tom Eat Snacks, Topics with Michael & Michael

FOODS: Pizza, tacos, pizza tacos, any kind of asian, bbq, anything fried with cheese on it, and Pho, which is probably the world's most perfect food.
Six things I could never do without
High speed internet
My dog, Dickripper
A good book
Old school Vans hi-tops
Comedy Bang Bang: the podcast
A sense of humor
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Why are you keeping this curiosity door locked?

Hey girl, do you want to make a fragile human connection in the vast and unfeeling infinity of a chaotic universe?

Does the body rule the mind or does the mind rule the body? I dunno.

Is it possible to overdose on a Vick's Vapo-Inhaler?
On a typical Friday night I am
Trying to figure out how a 36 year old man with social anxiety makes new friends.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer
You should message me if
If you're a fan of Twin Peaks, if you think the truth is out there, if you want to believe, if you're good at bar trivia, if you consider yourself sarcastic, or if you like the movie Wet Hot American Summer, let's hang out.

Alternately, we probably won't get along if you're racist, homophobic, anti-feminist, anti-abortion, a heavy drug user, a juggalo, super into wrestling or a fan of nickleback-style buttrock, if you're religious, DEFINITELY if you're white and have dreads, or if you voted for Trump.
The two of us