45 Tupelo, United States
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My self-summary
Hello ladies! I am a 42 year old sex machine. This machine does need a little oil though (if you know what I mean). I drive a hot little gas saver, an 76 Gremlin. I may need you to hold the radio when we go out. I have 6 cats that I love dearly. They all stay in my room with me. Hard thing about cats is keeping their crap picked up. I gave up on the litter box, so I am picking up little turds off the floor all the time. Don't worry, I will try to get them picked up before you come to my "love nest". I have no kids (that I'm aware of). I wouldn't have a problem if you have kids as long as they stay somewhere else. State of Mississippi says I can't be around kids. It was a little misunderstanding that happened with my neighbor's twelve year old daughter. I love twelve year olds. I am currently between jobs, but I do look in the paper. Hard to find a good job that fits my schedule. Oh yeah, don't plan any lunch dates cause I usually sleep till about two.
What I’m doing with my life
Not much right now. I play Call of Duty (Call of Doody) alot. I am pretty good at video games. I take care of my cats. I surf the internet. In the summer I have an inflatable pool that I like to lay in.
I’m really good at
Video games and sex. I have always wanted to have sex while playing a video game. That would be awesome. Maybe me and you could make my fantasy a reality. You could pick the game. I am good at most of them. Just don't pick Kingdom Hearts. That game was stupid.
The first things people usually notice about me
Probably my good looks or my great body. I have a real man's body. Or maybe my car, but that is just cause it needs to be painted.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Not big on reading. I do have a very large collection of "art" magazines. I am more into pictures of models than words. I like the movie Joe Dirt, Deliverance, and anything with Megan Fox in it. I like Ax Men, Duck Dynasty, and cartoons. My favorite music is ACDC and Lynyrd Skynyrd. I will eat anything that You cook. I don't cook except for microwaving hot dogs. I eat alot of cereal. The cats usually like to finish the milk and what they don't finish I will.
The six things I could never do without
Momma (you will have to meet her before we do the deed unless we do it at your place. I can bring my video game system if you don't have one),
My cats,
My car,
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How to beat video games.
On a typical Friday night I am
Either playing video games or watching one of my private movies.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I live in my mom's old room. She has to stay in the living room now. She has to stay in the bed, but she sleeps alot and probably would not hear your screams of ecstasy. If you would be too embarrassed to face her, you can go out the window. But you would definitely have to leave after. I have a single size bed and I will be going to sleep not long after.
You should message me if
You should not answer me. I hope you know this is a joke. I have met a nice woman and we are dating. I just thought it would be funny.