I just want to say thank you for everyone helping with my thesis whether you knew it or not. I was able to prove that physical attractiveness matters more than personality ever will. Think of attractiveness as a college degree. You need to be attractive to get the attention of someone while you're personality seals the deal. Just like how you need a college degree to get that interview where your presentation and skills seals the deal for a job.
I created three profiles with the same profile summaries and sent the same exact message to the same people. The only exception was the profile picture where each used ugly, average, and attractive pictures respectively. The "ugly" and "average" profile barely got any responses while the attractive profile had huge success. Imagine that.
It just goes to show that you're very unlikely to find anyone online if you're unattractive. Both men and women go for looks alone despite what they may say. Women that have said looks are not as important have demonstrated the same thing that women who say looks matter do. You're better off meeting someone in real life where you'll let them see your personality and you can attract them that way.
It's funny since those same women who constantly go for the very attractive guys also keep finding themselves constantly being single. The same goes for the guys too. People should just open themselves up to the possibility that someone who isn't necessarily a 10 on any scale can still be a perfect match.
Short Message vs Long Message
I've seen many women who claim that they refuse to respond to guys who don't create an adequate length of a message. A little odd considering these women still responded to the "attractive" profile and even sent short messages themselves. A little hypocritical, aren't we?
People want someone to take the time to write out a long, unique message as their first message. I hate to break it to you but most guys will not do this because it's so time consuming to do this to everyone we contact when they likely will not respond. The first message is an icebreaker of sorts to see if there is mutual interest before starting a conversation.
Kind of like what you do when you first approach someone at a bar, the store, etc. You don't approach them and start babbling on about yourself. You usually do a simple greeting or make a comment about something you observed.
This is one of the most ridiculous things that I have seen on here and likely just a cop out because people are afraid to actually take a chance for once. You're not going to find a guy on here that will just want to be friends. Newsflash! We're on here looking for a DATE (or something more than friends)! This is a dating website after all.
This isn't some romance novel or film. Dating a best friend often creates complications but then a lot of women who want friends first likely never thought of that. This is the real world and not some fantasy. Yes, best friends do end up together romantically but not as often as you want (or hope).
They also likely forgot to realize that guys are not on here looking for just friends. We may agree to be friends with you but we'll keep on looking for someone to date. Imagine you start being friends with a guy and then he ends up finding someone that he really likes. Hopefully you don't develop feelings for him!
The same goes for those who come on here specifically looking for friends. This is a dating site. It's the same thing as me going to grocery store trying to buy a car. NO guy signs up to a DATING website just to get more friends. Also, stop getting upset when guys keep asking you out on a date.
BBW, HWP, Curves in the Right Places, Curvy, Not Barbie, Not a Stick, etc
All of these scream overweight or obese. There's no way to sugar coat it since these terms are used excessively. All guys see when someone uses those is fat. There's nothing wrong with being fat (other than the health complications).
Another thing that I have noticed that ties into this is that overweight women often only see weight in the extremes. That is that they only see fat and incredibly thin. They fail to realize that there are people who fit in-between but continue to insult those who are not fat.
Some people know how to take care of themselves through a proper diet and exercise. Sure some may be lucky with a fast metabolism. There's no need to insult them. It also creates a bad image for yourself since the guy will assume you lack self-confidence and are very bitter. We try to stay away from people like that.
Telling Someone You're Not Interested
It's normally better to just not respond if you're not interested. It's more "hurtful" to be told you're not interested rather than be ignored. Next time just don't respond to their message. If they keep messaging you then block them.
Pictures Taken as Odd Angles to Hide Being Overweight
I honestly don't know why women still continue to do this. It's not like we can't tell you're trying to hide something. You're also wasting their time as well as yours by not being honest. Someone should like you for you so there's no reason to hide yourself.
Lying About Weight
This goes along with what I have said about creative camera pictures. Be honest and don't waste everyone's time.
Men also find it annoying when women using annoying cliches or phrases such as old soul, looking for Mr. Right, looking for prince charming, likes to get dirty, etc. It's very annoying. I'm sure there's countless phrases women hate men to say. There's no difference.
I'll also add that saying you're an old soul or mature for your age is BS. I have yet to encounter anyone who claims that and it actually turn out to be true.
The prince charming phrase is a little funny. A ton of people want prince charming but don't you think prince charming would want a princess? The princess has always been submissive and helpless. That's a little boring, isn't it?
Excuses to Why You're on Here
There's no need to make excuses that a friends signed you up or insult the website. You're on here for the same reasons as everyone else. There's no need to lie about it. The same goes for guys too.
Spelling and Grammar
It matters a lot on the internet. It influences how people perceive you. If you have constant spelling and grammar mistakes then people assume you're not very educated. Writing in all caps is annoying as well. You only have one chance to make a good impression so you should do your best to do just that.
I'll also point out that an occasional mistake is not what I'm referring to. If whatever you type is riddled with mistakes then that's the problem.
Purposely Showing Cleavage
It's easy to tell when you're purposely trying to show cleavage. If you hate guys making sexual remarks then don't show it. It's as simple as that.
Only Looking at Pictures Before Contacting
Women do it too. I've received several messages from women who haven't even read this profile before contacting me.