NoamDePlume
36 Hamilton, Canada
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NoamDePlume
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My self-summary
This profile has gotten long. But that's probably a good thing. While being physically attracted to someone is important, There needs to be more than that to pique an interest and make a good connection... or some such thing. Anyway, on with the show.

According to many, I'm a cute guy with a dog. Of course this is a completely subjective analysis... The cute part I mean; I objectively have a dog. Of course that doesn't describe who I am. It just proves that I can babble complete nonsense.

I guess I'm intelligent; many people have said I am. However, I don't have any readily available test results to confirm it. Plus, I think it's the kind of intelligence that can't manifest itself in meaningful ways. My brain is mostly cluttered with useless geography/history trivia and old TV/movie lines.

I play/write music , and if I do say so myself, I'm really quite terrible. I play bass guitar guitar. I also "know" how to play the drums, but don't have the coordination to pull it off very well. I'm also told I do a spot on John K Samson. If you ask nicely I'll show it off. I knit and crochet. I'm also good fixing/building things. Pretty much good at anything with my hands in general.

I tend to be a bit of a lefty-pinko-socialist in my political beliefs, and one day aspire to world domination. All will tremble in terror before my generous social programs and progressive environmental management!!!

If you're one of those people who likes convenient categories, I'm INTJ (sometimes INTP if the moon aligns just right)

Basically, what you're looking at is an aging hipster punk desperately avoiding being ordinary *shudder*.
um... What else...

I've been told I'm one in a million*

*Editor's note: Given that there are over seven billion people on earth it is therefore reasonable to assume there are over seven thousand people like him. Maybe more, as this is a subjective statement based on a small number of reviews and not any empirical studies.
What I’m doing with my life
Being sarcastic.

Living in Downtown Hamilton.
One time I went to the suburbs... It was indescribably awful.
Raising a cat and dog.
Bestowing noble titles on said pets.
Every Monday to Friday I zone out from about nine AM to five PM. Somehow this garners a regular paycheck.
I’m really good at
Well I don't want to brag, but... [awkward throat clearing cough]...

Let's move on shall we.
The first things people usually notice about me
...is a secret known only to them.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books:
Informational stuff, Dystopian fiction, pretentious crap, etc. Book learnin' is fun.

(if you bring up the walking dead, I will discuss the comics as if you actually care)

Movies:
Want to hear my thesis on why the original Robocop is an objectively great movie? I used to love going to movies, but fifteen years of superheros, remakes, and sequels have rendered my tolerance paper thin.

Shows:
Remember when StarTrek revolved around Piccard outwitting his adversaries? Those were good times... Dr Who, and Orange is the New Black are pretty great though.

Music:
Almost fifteen years later, this song still send shivers down my spine. If you like the same dinosaur music as me I will swoon. Bonus points if you're pretentious like me and have a fucktonne of vinyl.

Food:
I like things I can extract nutrients from or convert into adenosine triphosphate.

If you must know; sushi, cheese, all the chickpeas...
The six things I could never do without
Hydrogen
Oxygen
Carbon
Nitrogen
Phosphorous
Calcium

Six things I could easily do without:
Sentences starting with "I don't want to sound racist, but..."
Imperial measurements
Housing as a profit market
Gender roles
People who take themselves too seriously or are painfully self-unaware.
My pets fighting at 3 in the morning
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Besides the obvious?

Every damned thing on the planet. You know when you can't stop your mind from moving over every subject imaginable?

... Oh... well I do.
On a typical Friday night I am
At a bar with some friends, droning on about some historical anecdote people have long since stopped listening to.

As a craft beer snob you'll find me at only the finest dive bars. I prefer laid-back dive bars over noisy pubs and I prefer noisy pubs over dance clubs (Hey that rhymes!). Ergo, I don't care for loud crowded places.

I guess that's more of an ideal Friday, not a typical one. It could just as easily be staying in... also might be a Saturday.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Don't let this profile fool you, I'm actually kind of funny in real life.**

**Not a guarantee
You should message me if
You are interested in having a delightful conversation about heavy topics filled with absurdities while having a beer or three... or perhaps wine and board games.

In closing, I am very interested in the opportunity to join your team and would like to schedule an interview to learn more about how I can support your organization’s objectives.

References available upon request.
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