Describing someone as "nice" is the worst insult, ever. If all you have to say about a person is that they are nice, you actually mean they are lame, boring, and you couldn't care less about them. Notice no one is every talking about how awesome someone is and then adds, oh and they are nice. Never. It's only when you have no words left to describe how lame and pathetic someone is that you have to resort to, "Well, I mean, but at least he's nice." If you don't know what I'm talking about, then you must be one of these "nice" people. So, go hurt yourself somehow. I'd rather be described as a cocksucker than as a nice person and I don't even like sucking dick.
Global Warming. Polar bears are cute, but my SUV kicks ass.
Lots of people say they would do ANYTHING for a million dollars. They sometimes even add, "I swear! ANYTHING!" Really, anything? By anything, those people always mean anything except things that require hard work, time, effort, a proper education, etc. In other words, they mean that if someone handed them a million dollars they would take the money. No shit.
Who's Pepe Silvia? And, did he ever get his mail?
When I'm drunk I park in the handicap zone. I don't even feel bad about it because aren't those spots for people who can't walk straight, anyway?