rampage303
28 Colorado Springs, United States
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rampage303
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My self-summary
Wilson Pickett got arrested on various occasions for being drunk in public, recklessly driving his Cadillac, and wielding a shotgun.
Sometimes all three at once.
We should all aspire to be more like Wilson Pickett.

Tall, dark, and thinks too much.
(Hence, dark.)

In the mornings I get up short of sleep, because I'm chronically a night owl. May or may not run my fingers through my hair, since the look I typically go for is "sex-hair." I throw healthy things in my briefcase and a book, throw on a big black coat, sunglasses, fancy shoes, and sometimes a hat and tie, then I head to the office. I probably get there a smudge late and immediately start guzzling coffee, throw on some music, and go rushing through paperwork. I rarely take off my coat.

Much of the day is spent making art and listening to podcasts. The art is for my real business in clothing and art pieces, and the podcasts are so I have something to contribute to conversation unexpectedly. Then I may run some errands, make dinner, lift some weights, play guitar, stay up too late sewing, watching old movies, and sipping hard liquor.

And sometimes on the weekend I work more, visit a girlfriend, or a goth night in several cities. Or a concert. Or art gallery. Or weird bar. Or something outdoorsy. Then at week's end my nocturnal schedule has started to reassert itself and I start off the week exhausted, and continue to go to bed late, because it's my new schedule, regardless of my workaday routine, and I have more coffee, and then I've drunk it too late into the afternoon, and I'm going up on thirty, so I'll be up all night, and then I lose more sleep, waking from a dead, dreamless slumber, and I'm starting to expect that a physical or mental illness may be edging closer, but if this lack of sleep is taking time off my life, it will also be less time to have a student loan debt hanging above me like the sword of Damocles.

Anyway, hi. I'm a contributing member of society that votes, owns a business, works several jobs, went to 7 years or so of college (without getting a degree, but it was in film anyway, so fuck it.) However, I don't really think of myself that way. I'm not sure why I put that first other than wanting to take you on an increasingly long roller-coaster of trying to get a sense of me. I think of myself as more of an artist, lefty, intellectual, dandy, skirt-chasing, hedonistic, weirdo. I can't tell if I'm cynical, realistic, or just a news junkie. Complicating matters is that I'm a contrarian.

I like the arts, philosophy, history, and people.
Except for the ones I don't like.

I'm just trying to balance "can do" with "fuck you."

Speaking of fucking you, my relationship status is "available" and "involved." It's like a quantum state that I think of as Consentual Non-monogamy/polyamory/slutty.

I probably won’t marry.
I don’t see the point outside of a legal context.
But if you have good insurance or citizenship for me, I'll consider it. Especially since I'm living in a place where Donald Trump seems to be people's answer to... Life? Well, whatever, my personality probably fits Europe better.

Politically, I land in some idealistic wasteland between Socialist and Libertarian. A pragmatic utopian would probably be accurate. Often a depressed or disappointed humanist. (...What do I mean "often?")
I also doubt I will ever in good conscience vote for a member of the modern GOP, if that means anything to you. I'm young, surprisingly optimistic, and broke. Straight white maleness aside, I'm really not in the right wing's wheelhouse. Must be all those queers, minorities, and sane people I hang out with.

Philosophically I believe everything exists for a reason, and that reason is causality. Possibly inevitability. Inevitable, because, well, here you are, reading this. I also don’t believe, in general, that we’re special or insignificant. I believe that dogmatic beliefs are destructive, but I’m flexible on it. As the Tao says "the flexible are disciples of life. The inflexible are disciples of death." Like a stick. (if sticks have beliefs.) Maybe they get set in their ways with age. Also like a stick, I believe free will may very well be an illusion of consciousness, but there's no reason not to strive anyway. And also like a stick, I warm myself by burning the elderly. Sticktoitiveness.

I have an okc handle from my early internet days, before privacy piracy, and terror ruled the land. The 303 denotes home, but I've been lead away by economic realities to what feels like the border lands of the Global South. It's warmer here. Like hell.

I’d like to travel, though I don’t much. There's a whole planet to see, though I tend to see more similarities than differences in it. Take the home environment away from us, and we become much the same. Fucking and oxygen sucking beasts leaving a trail of dead skin, oil, and hair on everything we touch. Beasts that fight over which version of god is more loving and forgiving. For which sins. In a system he created. At least the art of his/her/its followers is good.

I like the feeling of an abandoned planet and a quiet house. I’m either an ambivert or an introvert gifted at faking it.

I’m also not inclined to send the first message. I’ve seen the inboxes of friends. If you’re a man, you seldom get any messages, if you’re a woman, you get too many to read, and most are crap. I don't know why I'm mansplaining this to myself. I read profiles and questions. I’m more inclined to write if you’re at least in the 80% range. If you're below a 50% match, my experience is that you won't know when I'm being condescending. (That means I'm talking down to you.)

My turn-ons include, but are not limited to curly hair. And original thoughts. And dyed hair. And eloquence. And straight hair. And curves. And chopped hair. And big eyes. And no hair. And kindness.

I prefer clambering arroyos and mountains to beaches and walks. An empty street and garden in bloom. I sneak into old graveyards at night to listen to Mozart and fuck dates. More fun than piña coladas and getting caught in the rain, and definitely more fulfilling than hearing that god damned song again.
What I’m doing with my life
On the hunt for the most dangerous game. I appear to be surrounded. Outnumbered 7,400,000,000 to one.

I’m perpetually a student, but the institutional learning is on hold while I open a business. A friend of mine and I have the same aesthetic, and find the same need for a late night coffee and bohemian hangout to get funky clothes and art. Our hobbies include antiquing, relentless thrifting, and we each have different brain problems. Naturally, entrepreneurship seemed the way to go. treeinthemoon would be he, if you want my dress sense, and a whimsical type of self-loathing. One of my favorite people on Earth. And I suppose just keep reading if it's me you're after. You've made it this far after all. Why stop now?

Once in a while I’m hired to act, make hideously gory wounds from household items, or aim a camera at the "action." I love film. (well, actually video, but whatever.) I regularly do handyman work, filming, design, photography, editing, and whatever pays, in whatever field. If I can listen to my ipod on the clock, I’m inclined to do it. If the customer base weren’t primarily men, I would probably add gigolo to the list. Though I probably wouldn’t get to listen to my ipod on that job. In any case, I don’t wear my suits enough.

In my personal life, I like to date witty, poly people here and there, write, make visual art, and listen to hours of lectures, podcasts, books. I balance out my drinking hobby with exercise, and I like dark things, so naturally I like to dance my ass off at goth clubs whenever I can. Any excuse to paint on the eyeliner. Because I dress up in black anyway. I am so goth, existence dreads me. I am so goth, light does not escape my surface. Most of it. Like, the parts covered in black. Otherwise I'm rather glowy in low light. With a yellowish tinge. Might be liver problems. Probably unknown ancestry amidst the Celts and their conquerors. I tan decently, is what I'm saying. That's something I'm doing with my life periodically. Not really on purpose. I just live next to a nuclear inferno. I'm reasonably sure this is temporary.

Hobbies include pondering the troubles of the world, their possible solutions, and swiping left. If you'd like a lovely time out, an excuse to dress to the nines, or a terribly depressing conversation about the world, I'm in. Why not all those things?

Adjectives (labels): Polyamorous / Non-Monogamous, ADHD, XY, SNAFU, INFJ (-ish), Dandy, Artsy, Hedonistic, Weird, Pope☆, Musical, Visual, Independent, Carnivorous, Virgo, Epicurean, Colorful, Black-clad, Comical, Terminal, Ignorant, Intelligent, Loved, Curious, Hyperborean, Graphomaniac

☆Long ago and in a far off woodland, I was made a Discordian Pope. The bard wearing nothing but a guitar and an immodest robe of green velvet asked of me

"You wanna be a Discordian pope?"

I mulled it over. We were surrounded by pagans and I didn't wish to upset the natives. I nodded slowly with growing enthusiasm.

"Yeah, sure. Wha’ do I gotta do?"

I inquired through the haze of the vile rum concoction I'd used to wash down the strawberry tart, eaten off the vulva of the redhead spread out on the hor d’oeuvres table.
He raised his red Solo cup, filled of water with berries in it. He did half of the sign of the cross in the air between us, and finally said:

"There. You’re a Discordian Pope"

Now I am infallible.

(As a papal figure, I won't do weddings. My sincere first reaction to most invites is: "Eh, I'll go to your next wedding." I have similar reaction to funerals, too.)
I’m really good at
"Explaining things."

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/(_M_)\
\/~V~\/

A bat symbol of questionable quality is your reward for scrolling. I hope you finger isn't tired.

"I'm really good at" part ii

Acquiring superfluous hats and sunglasses.

The arts, especially visually and verbally oriented ones.

Writing long letters until people give up replying. I may be in the wrong century...

They call me an optimist, but I make optimists cry. More of a contrarian, really. Otherwise my depressed friends would have killed themselves by now. I suppose they wouldn't be friends at that point. Just memories.

I have a myriad of weird trivia that I learned instead of learning how to converse with other children. It’ll probably come up.

Goth “dancing.” A friend of mine describes it as “dancing on fire, underwater.” Mine tends to be more lively, and lately has spontaneously started incorporating some belly-dancing, martial arts, and Michael Jackson footwork. I have no explanation for this.

Pretending to know what I’m doing when I play guitar alone. Self-taught. Good groove, bad rhythm. Much potential, little grasp of theory.

Sex. Or so I'm told.
The first things people usually notice about me
People often notice that I look like someone they know. Sometimes they insist I am. Sometimes they ask for an autograph. I like to imagine they're temporal tourists. Especially when they say I'm a priest or reincarnated leader of Tibet.

People also swear I'm gigantic, seldom believing my height. Maybe it's the hair. Maybe it's the personality.

They notice I'm often well dressed.
(My Idea of dressed up often involves a tophat and tuxedo.)
If they ask the occasion, I should just tell them that I want my ghost to look good.

Peer Reviews:
A strange Depressed Hippie / Upbeat Goth.
A dirty dandy.
"A lot of person."
"Are you SURE, we haven't met? Your name is _________."
"A reluctant angel."
"The bee's knees."
"Tall, Dark, and Ridiculous."
"The most theatrical person I know."
"You sound like an old man."
"... Not a sociopath."
"Pretty."
"...Just trying to get feminist pussy."
To which I replied: I AM A FEMINIST PUSSY.
"I believe you're a good lover because you're a good person."
"JUST ADMIT YOU'RE [insert stranger's name here] OR THE GIRL GETS IT!"
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books:

1984, Red Dwarf, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, The Watchmen, Stardust, Slaughterhouse 5, The Shining, Pet Sematary, H.P. Lovecraft, Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas, Hiroshima, Carrie, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, The Long Hard Road Out of Hell, The Dragons of Eden, American Theocracy, Childhood's End, Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy, Guns Germs And Steel, Catcher in the Rye, Neverwhere, American Gods, Smoke and Mirrors, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, Good Omens, The Sandman, The Dark Knight Returns, Danse Macabre, Rant, The Life and Times of Gregorii Rasputin, Bonk, Spook, Stiff, The Dark Tower series, The Road, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Lamb, Moby Dick, Illuminatus!, The Evolution of God, Siddhartha, Fool, 1Q84, I Claudius, Blood Meridian,
Numerous books on Eastern philosophy, abnormal psychology, history, are usually occupying my ipod too. Along with Stephen King.

Last Books Read: Preacher, The Picture of Dorian Gray, 23 Things They Don't Tell you about Capitalism, Hellblazer vol. 3, Lucifer Volume 4, The Man in the High Castle, Rabid: A Cultural History of the World's Most Diabolical Virus, Man's Search for Meaning, Blood Meridian (for a 4th time!)

Currently Reading: The World until Yesterday, A Tractate on Japanese Aesthetics, The Exegesis of Philip K. Dick, The Evolution of Civilizations, The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich, Narcissus and Goldmund, The Other Side of History, Futureland, The Vampire Archives, Supergods, The Invisibles, Hellblazer, Lucifer, Acid Dreams, Capital in the 21st Century, A People's History of the United States, Sex at Dawn

Movies (motion pictures, films, videos, talkies):

COMEDY:
Airplane!, Army of Darkness, Bad Santa, Beetlejuice, The Birdcage, Dogma, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Ghostbusters, Grosse Pointe Blank, I Heart Huckabees, Men in Black, Monty Python's The Meaning of Life, Oh Brother Where Art Thou?, Office Space, Pulp Fiction, SLC Punk, Stranger Than Fiction, Thank You for Smoking, The Addams Family, Austin Powers, Being John Malkovich, The Blues Brothers, Coneheads, Death Becomes Her, Dr. Strangelove, Everything you ever wanted to know about sex but were afraid to ask, Gremlins, Groundhog Day, Harold and Maude, Last Action Hero, Mystery Men, Nine Dead Gay Guys, Popeye, Rat Race, Shrek, The Sandlot, Saved, School of Rock, Shaun of the Dead, Short Circuit, So I married an Axe Murderer, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Tropic Thunder, Black Dynamite, Walk Hard, The Other Guys, Paul, Some Like It Hot, The Rum Diary, The Other Guys, Calvary

DRAMA:
12 Angry Men, American Beauty, American History X, The Aviator, Dances With Wolves, Edward Scissorhands, The Elephant Man, Gangs of New York, Ghost Dog, Goodfellas, Grave of the Fireflies, Interview With the Vampire, Perfume, The Pianist, The Prestige, Requiem for a Dream, The Seventh Seal, The Shawshank Redemption, There Will Be Blood, To Kill a Mockingbird, Apocalypse Now, Apollo 13, Bamboozled, The Departed, Forrest Gump, Gattaca, The Messenger, Mullholland Drive, The People vs. Larry Flynt, Rashomon, Tideland, Titus, Dead Ringers, Road to Perdition, Network

SCI-FI & FANTASY:
12 Monkeys, 2001: A Space Odyssey, The Adventures of Baron VonMunchausen, Alien, Alien Nation, Back to the Future, Blade Runner, The City of Lost Children, Dark City, Dune, The Fountain, Highlander, Lord of the Rings, The Matrix, The Never Ending Story, Pan's Labyrinth, Planet of the Apes, Signs, Star Trek, THX 1138, Transformers, War of the Worlds, A.I., The Abyss, Alice, Altered States Bicentennial Man, Brazil, Cronos, The Day the Earth Stood Still, Dragonheart, E.T., The Fifth Element, Green Legend Ran, Hook, Howl's Moving Castle, Minority Report, The Point, A Scanner Darkly, The Secret of NIMH, Tank Girl, They Live, Time Bandits, Waking Life, What Dreams May Come, Wizards,

THRILLERS:
American Psycho, The Butterfly Effect, The Caveman's Valentine, Eraserhead, The Forgotten, Frailty, Hard Candy, Jacob's Ladder, Jaws, Momento, The Mothman Prophecies, No Country for Old Men, Perfect Blue, Pi, Red Dragon, The Sixth Sense, The Terminator, Training Day, Children of Men, The Dead Zone, The Devil's Backbone, Hannibal, A History of Violence, Le Samourai, The Machinist, The Ninth Gate, The Others, Pitch Black, Resevoir Dogs, Strangers on a Train, Syriana, Taxi Driver, Vanilla Sky, The Village, M, The Lady Vanishes, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, Red State, Brick, Dark Passage, Whiplash

HORROR:
Dracula, Dawn of the Dead, Gingersnaps, The Hunger, May, The Mist, Pet Semetary, The Ring, Saw, Seven, Silent Hill, The Thing, Tremors, 28 Weeks Later, Child's Play, The Day After, The Descent, The Devil's Rejects, Silence of the Lambs, Planet Terror, Frankenstein, Night of the Living Dead, A Nightmare on Elm Street, The Omen, Poltergeist, The Prophecy, Rosemary's Baby, Salem's Lot, The Serpent and the Rainbow, Session 9, The Shining, Silence of the Lambs, Wolf Creek, Wait Until Dark, The Blair Witch Project, Halloween (remake), Nosferatu The Vampyre, Antichrist, Let The Right One In, Let Me In, Dead Ringers, Melancholia, Evil Dead, Psycho

ACTION & ADVENTURE:
Batman, Blade, The Bourne Identity, Cloverfield, Desperado, Die Hard, End of Days, Enemy at the Gates, Equilibrium, Fight Club, The Good the Bad and the Ugly, High Plains Drifter, Indiana Jones, Jeremiah Johnson, Jurassic Park, Kill Bill, King Kong, The Last Samurai, Natural Born Killers, Pale Rider, Pirates of the Caribbean, Predator, The Professional, Robocop, Sin City, Sleepy Hollow, Spider-Man, Star Wars, Stargate, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, X-Men, Apocalypto, Bonnie and Clyde, Casino Royale, City on Fire, Constantine, The Edge, Gladiator, Hero, Hidden Fortress, House of Flying Daggers, The Hunt for Red October, La Femme Nikita, Master and Commander, Mission Impossible, Seven Samourai, Yojimbo, Zatoichi, Le Samourai, Drive, Coriolanus, Kingsmen

DOCUMENTARY:
Buy the Ticket Take the Ride, Crumb, The Weather Underground, American Hardcore, Baraka, The Business of Being Born, A Crude Awakening, Dan Aykroyrd Unplugged on UFOs, Jesus Camp, Punk: Attitude, Super Size Me, The Rise and Fall of the Slasher Film, Who Killed the Electric Car?, Woodstock, Dark Days, Super High Me, The Confederate States of America, Good Hair, Kumare

MUSICALS (I hate most musicals):
The Wall, Across the Universe, Little Shop of Horrors, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, anything by Parker and Stone

TV (da idiot box)
The Simpsons, Futurama, The Twilight Zone, Star Trek, Deadwood, The Wire, Breaking Bad, Invader Zim, The Boondocks, Moral Orel, The Oblongs, The Venture Brothers, Archer, The Walking Dead, Mad Men, Battlestar Galactica, Lost, South Park, Twin Peaks, Cosmos, Boston Legal, Metalocalypse, Clone High, Daria, Alien Nation, Dexter, House, The Critic, The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, Sherlock, Luther, Black Books, The Kids In The Hall, The X-Files, 30 Days, Roseanne, Torchwood, Ugly Americans, Boardwalk Empire, Game of Thrones, Duckman, Spaced, Hannibal, Vikings, Better Call Saul, Sons of Anarchy, Agents of Shield

Music:
I don't listen to the radio. I got a head start on that being out of touch with popular culture after my 20's thing.
I almost always dig:
Nick Cave,
Sisters of Mercy,
Bright Channel,
The Chameleons,
and The Builders and the Butchers.

POST PUNK, GOTH, ELECTRONIC, INDUSTRIAL:
Peter Murphy, Nine Inch Nails, Alien Sex Fiend, Dead Can Dance, Joy Division, Bauhaus, Siouxsie & The Banshees, Sisters of Mercy, The Chameleons UK, The Cure, Depeche Mode, Echo & The Bunnymen, Fields of the Nephilim, Moby, Paul Oakenfold, Attrition, Killing Joke

ROCK & ROLL:
The Doors, Pink Floyd, The Beatles, Thin Lizzy, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Dick Dale, Hawkwind, Led Zeppelin, Queen, The Rolling Stones, Steppenwolf, Deep Purple, Electric Light Orchestra, Tom Petty, Buddy Holly, The Cars, Patti Smith

RHYTHM, HIP HOP, REGGAE, SOUL, JAZZ, & BLUES:
Portishead, John Lee Hooker, Skip James, B.B. King, George Thorogood, The Kilimanjaro Darkjazz Ensemble, Muddy Waters, Miles Davis, Bob Marley, Ray Charles, Public Enemy, The Mount Fuji Doom Jazz Corporation, Henry Mancini, John Coltrane, The Mahavishnu Orchestra, Bohren & der Club of Gore, Howlin' Wolf, Wilson Pickett, Cab Calloway, Frank Sinatra, Billie Holiday

METALS:
Apocalyptica, Atomic Rooster, Marilyn Manson, Motorhead, Mercyful Fate, Black Sabbath, Blue Oyster Cult, Opeth, Judas Priest, Iron Maiden, Type O Negative, Arch Enemy, Dimmu Borgir, Probot, Devildriver

ALTERNATIVE, INDIE, PROG, MISC:
Jane's Addiction, King Crimson, Tool, A Perfect Circle, Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds, The Dresden Dolls, Alice in Chains, The Cardigans, Gorillaz, Bob Dylan, Bright Channel, Sky Cries Mary, The Builders & The Butchers, PJ Harvey

PUNKY:
The MC5, The Stooges, The Pogues, The Dead Kennedys, Big Black, The Damned

COMPOSERS:
Krzysztof Penderecki, Bedrich Smetana, Johan Sebastian Bach, Bela Bartok, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Ludwig Van Beethoven, Johannes Brahms

FOOD:

I have lived off of nuts and fruit. (but not the nuts of fruits.)
I have lived off of cookies, wine, tobacco, and beer.
I prefer foreign cuisine.

American Cuisine
(which I guess is mostly farmer foods from foreigners?),

Ethiopian,
Indian,
Chinese,
Thai,
Japanese,
Mexican,
Jamaican,
Persian
and Granola/Healthy/Boulderite type of foods.

If someone opened an Ethiopian/Thai/Mexican/Jamaican/Indian restaurant, I would glut myself to DEATH.

I'd like to be vegetarian, but my body won't let me. I'll console myself with the notion that for aeons, we ran from the animals, and it's our time now. Not to mention, it would be like poaching to just wear their skin and hair.
Oh, and those posters that say "why eat one and not the other?" with a piglet and a puppy: I'd eat the puppy too.
I'd voluntarily eat a person under the right circumstances. And when you think about it, well all know what a monkey finger tastes like. I think about that when I burn my finger making a vegetable stir-fry. Did you know that mushrooms are more closely related to animals than plants? I've ingested those for all sorts of reasons ....good times.
The six things I could never do without
Oxygen, Hydrogen, Carbon, Magnesium, Sodium, Potassium, Nitrogen, Sulfur, etc

Stereoscopic Sights

Stereophonic Sounds

Self Statement

Senseless Silliness

Aimless Alliteration

Artistic ... Arts

Sexy... Sex...?
Should have stopped at six.
...Slutty
...overwhelming
...Consensual
...Amorous
...Licking
...Lovely
...Magnificent
...English .
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Anything funny.

"Why anything?"

Infinity.

Nothing. (or the absence of it)

Nudity and clothing.

Compassionate Nihilism.

Time doesn't exist.... For now.

Age/Future/Accomplishment/Decay/Death

I just take the world with a pile of salt.

Things I'd like to experience.

Trying to make sense of the world, through many eyes.

How contemptible capitalism is and how I can't come up with a better system since we're animals.

If you're really curious, you can see my twitter feed @ryanflint

Ignorance is bliss. Knowledge is power. Power is corrupting. Tell me more...

The intersection of philosophy, art, and psychology to gain insight into perception and the shaping of the world.

"It doesn't matter how beautiful you are. Someone, somewhere is sick of your shit."

Philosophical exercises as to how a theoretical god could exist. I can't really wholly believe it. Just existential mind rending.

Holy fuck, I'm drunk. Holy drunk, I'm anything at all. Drunk and holy, I'm fucked.

The ADHD that manifests by playing music in my head a lot.

"I think I need some E.S.T! Or a trip to the MOOOON!" - Alien Sex Fiend

How I could possibly ever be as cool as Nick Cave.

What line of reasoning led Lon Chaney's Phantom of the Opera to have a combover?

"The future's uncertain, and the end is always near. So let's roll, baby, roll!" - Jim Morrison

Space/time is money. Money is the taproot of all evil. Good and evil are arbitrary human concepts.

"If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

How every right angle and human decision is a support system for our genitals, but everything not directly related to survival is art.

"If you believe something, you're automatically precluded from believing in the opposite, which means that a degree of your human freedom has been forfeited in the act of this belief."
- Terence McKenna

Eternal now is a concept I can wrap my head around. As is four dimensional time. But I have to wonder if there's a difference. The new physics and the ancient philosophy fight for point of view, and while they do, I still need to eat and put away something for the retirement fund.

"Fragility of the leprosy bacterium suggests that infections result from something more than casual contact with an armadillo."
-A real sentence in a real scientific paper. Go ahead, Google it.

Whether I'll every make proper use of my surgeon's cuffs and shove my arms in some blood and guts while wearing my suit. Because, fuck taking off your jacket.

How to add more content to this page while stripping it down to the poetic clarity of Cormac McCarthy, while keeping it as flowery and filled with personality as Raymond Chandler or H.P. Lovecraft, and whether that's a James Joyce bit of hackitude.
Any lit majors know what I'm saying up in that run-on?

Am I in it for the sex? Isn't everyone? Isn't the entirety of society?
Right angles, industrialized food production, soft materials, aren't they all there to support our genitalia, ultimately?
Would an asexual be circumventing the system, or does their contribution to the system support everyone else's genitals?
If I were asexual, would I actually do anything with that extra time? Would I just be a needy friend? Would I be demonstrating that hell really is other people? (Sartre said it) Why then, is solitary confinement one of the worst tortures?
Once the hierarchy of survival needs are met, do you paint for a check, for a lay, or for spiritual fulfillment? What does it say that Christians love Thomas Kinkade's soullessly, mass produced, ghost painted work?
If I add salt to a dish, being as it's not typically adding directly to my survival, is it enhancing my pleasure to support my reproductive needs in some ultimate way, or is a salt just a salt? I do need salt to live, but not to eat. Does sodium lead to sodomy?

"The shadow of the ax hangs over every joy." -Cormac McCarthy
On a typical Friday night I am
FRIDAYS ARE IRRELEVANT.
FRIDAYS ARE AN ARTIFICIAL CONSTRUCT.
I CHOOSE TO GET DOWN AT ALL TIMES.
Because as the Irish say:
"Time's an English invention t'make a man work more than's good for 'im."

On a given night I'm:
Possibly staring up at the moon, planets, stars.
Possibly staying up all night, taking in stories.
Possibly sipping from a flask in public.
Possibly writing a script.
Possibly taking photos.
Possibly rambling about.
Possibly among graves.
Possibly clubbing. (not seals)
Possibly playing guitar until my fingers and ears are sore at me.
Possibly painting.
Possibly playing video games while listening to audiobooks.
Possibly working out while watching Batman.
Possibly at a paganistic, orgiastic, bacchanal.
Possibly entertaining friends.
Possibly entertaining myself.
Possibly entertaining possibilities.

Probably while wearing something improbably fancy.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
"I like big butts AND I CANNOT DIE."
- treeinthemoon

Based on past experience, I'll probably shrug in indifference at something you love dearly. Off the top of my head:
Joss Whedon, Doctor Who, Harry Potter, Hip Hop, The Beatles, Nirvana, The Smashing Pumpkins, Apple, Indie Film, Records, Fixies, Designer Labels, Rothko, Industrial, House of 1000 Corpses, Discussion Groups, God, Wes Anderson, Ukeleles, Ben Folds, Indie Music, Bridesmaids, The Social Network, Inception, Casablanca, Amelie, Big Bang Theory, Bars, Radiohead, Musicals, Mumford and Sons, Hunger Games, Hyperbole and a Half, The Great Gatsby, Children, Marjiuana, Sublime, Judd Appatow, Anime, Gun Rights, Deathcab for Cutie, Reality TV, Analog, Extroversion, Faith, Lost in Translation, Weddings, Rocky Horror Picture Show, Vegetarianism, Anne Rice, Ska, Mindless Self Indulgence, Anger, Jack Johnson, Ween, Weezer, Boardgames, Angry Birds, iPads, Bill Murray, The Alchemist, On The Road, Regina Spektor, Johnny Cash, David Bowie, Ignorance, Elliot Smith, Warcraft, Macklemore, Repo!, Cake, Tech N9ne, ICP, Tool, Tina Fey, Strip Clubs, IPA, septum piercings, EDM, Pokemon, Musical Theater, Knitwear, Kardashians, Shipping, A capella, etc.
If I'm not offending you, are you contrarian, robotic, foreign, uncultured, depressed, or... me?

I am going to die.
And I find it overly optimistic to think that some part of me will or should go on into eternity.
Yes, I find Hell to be overly optimistic.
All's well that ends.
...
That's optimistic, isn't it?

I'm somewhere between private and overly direct. Maybe it's a balancing act? In any case I think I'm constantly teetering based on what people tell me.

In the spirit of openness here's a few eccentricities, without having to get to know me.
(Because everything preceding this didn't count apparently. ... In fact, did you read to the end? Or did you just skip to it like a novel? I AM NOT A NOVEL! I AM A MAAAAAAN!)

I can only get off if the other person is getting off. I'd make a pretty ineffective rapist... Unless of course that's what you want...
Which is exactly the sort of thing you ask a wish granting, magical creature when making mischief;
"I wish for you not to grant me this wish."
*GENIE EXPLOSION*

I have done mind altering substances and found the results to be: "Groovy."

I think sex may be my religion. On my knees to please others for hours at a time. To make them cry god's name.

I am progressively less body shy. Having no air conditioning in home or car may be a contributing factor. Also, occasional hotubbing with people who are internet famous in a way you don't show your mother.

I am on FetLife. It is not worth your time to find me.

I enjoy a show about a vampire cop called Forever Knight.
On multiple levels.

I still buy cds. And occasionally cassette tapes.

I recognize far too much of myself in Simon Pegg's character from World's End.

I've always really wanted to have sex with a bald lady. Why? Because anyone could shave their head, but no one does. Therefore; it's exotic. Should I just find a dating site for cancer patients?

What panics me on a primal level is trying to encompass the infinity of scale. Large or small, it's impossible to conceive of and it's infinite in either direction. My brain shrieks and retreats at some point and then I'm left wondering what matters for a long, dark, moment.

Which makes me think of this:

“The most terrifying fact about the universe is not that it is hostile but that it is indifferent, but if we can come to terms with this indifference, then our existence as a species can have genuine meaning. However vast the darkness, we must supply our own light.”
Does this explain why Stanley Kubrick's eyes are so rapey?

I refuse to update my IMDB billing info. I'm keeping that $20 a month until I am worth looking up on there.

I have few if any secrets that come to mind per se. But if they were really secrets, would I tell you?
You should message me if
If you have an all consuming curiosity and lust for life that one usually only finds in flower children and happy drugs.

If you giggle at Colgate toothpaste because you know what it means in Spanish. (It's not nice)

If you only see sunrise willingly because you've been up that long.

If your sense of humor is very broad and you're still baffled by popular culture.

If you have an appreciation for headspace as much as the wide open spaces.

If you have ANY idea who Charles Beaumont is.

You Googled who Charles Beaumont is.

If you don't use some variation of the word "interesting" to describe yourself.

If you read my whole profile, and feel like it.

If you're undead. Because, no matter what variety, that sounds interesting.

If you want a good conversation, a stiff sipping drink, some tasty food, and with someone you find attractive.

If you think Douglas Adams may have been a very sad person.

If you believe apocalyptic scenarios, eschatology, and the like may be an expression of a mind's knowledge about its imminent mortality.

You don't think Marylin Manson makes goth music and that Blink 182 is punk, and you are thus a curmudgeonly Gen Xer... Sup?

If you can and will string together more than a couple of sentences.
I will never send you something like "hay U wanna fukc?."
(unless it's funny)
Be inquisitive, please.

If you can identify French Cuffs, Collar Stays, Wingtips, Surgeon's Cuffs, Cumberbunds, Cravats, Epaulettes, Gunflaps, Brogues, Oxfords, or the difference between a Trilby, Fedora, Homburg, Porkpie, Gambler, Derby, and Bowler because you like a man all gussied up.
(one of those is a trick!)
If you know all that, because you're a sartorial-sexual, I may be your type. If you know all that because you're a haberdasher and or tailor, please give me your card.
And if you're wearing a Homburg... are you my grandpa?

On hats: the people who wear them instead of developing a personality are almost always wearing a trilby or a porkpie. Which are ugly.
In the 90's these folks were walking around with iguanas on their shoulders.
If the hat wearer has a personality, they're likely into jazz these days.
If not, they're likely a lost soul, full of hate, with hair instead of a jawline, and no idea why something looks good.

If you think someone has better hair than Erykah Badu.
[Protip: No one does.]

If you are Erykah Badu.
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