rcbutterfly
27 Kingwood, United States
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rcbutterfly
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My self-summary
IMPORTANT:
1) If you cannot find the time to answer compatibility questions and significantly fill in your profile, then I cannot find the time to answer your messages; I will delete them without responding.

2) If you cannot write/speak intelligently (using appropriate grammar/minimal spelling errors) in ENGLISH, then don't bother messaging me because I'm not likely to respond.

3) If you don't live in the United States of America, you are wasting my time. If you live outside of the state of Texas, you are ALSO wasting my time. If you live MORE THAN 50 miles outside of the Houston city limits, you are wasting my time. Please don't waste my time: if you are not a legal citizen/legal resident or NOT an American then you are unlikely to get a response from me period. I'm not looking for a long distance relationship and won't respond to messages from people that live outside of the U.S.A.
-Thanks for understanding!

The truth is I have Fibromyalgia and am disabled. I say this in an attempt at full disclosure because there are people out there who openly admit that they don't want to be with someone who has a chronic illness that limits that person in some way or another. I don't hold such a preference against anyone but I also don't want to spend a significant amount of time getting to know someone who feels that way because its a waste of time and energy for all parties involved. What I have is a controversial disorder/disease. It's controversial because there are large portions of the medical community that seem to believe that people who claim to be in immense pain all the time are not telling the truth. I've heard Fibromyalgia sufferers be called lazy, that the problem is all in their head and that if they'd 'just exercise', they wouldn't be in pain all the time. The experience has left me with a deep sense of empathy for those dealing with equally chronic and time consuming disorders.

I've always been an HONEST person and bent over backwards to do a good job in school, at work and to help other people in need. Having made such an effort to be a good, honest person makes being accused of being at the very least dishonest insulting. Imagine going to a doctor with a headache and the doctor says to you "Well I cannot prove you have or do not have a headache but most people don't need to see a doctor for a headache. So you are either scamming for drugs to abuse, or are a hypochondriac, or even worse crazy. Maybe you should just go run some laps to fix your unsubstantiated headache". How would you feel? And how would you react? You aren't so much offended because the doctor can't prove you have something wrong with you; you are offended because the doctor is treating you as if your complaint is not legitimate and that you are some how wasting the doctor's time with efforts to 'score prescription drugs' for off-label use or even worse you are some kind of hypochondriac, just seeking attention (which makes you "crazy" in the Doc's eyes). I'll keep this rant to a minimum but I hope you can see how maddening it is to fight such an up hill battle.

I studied to be a massage therapist in the summer of 2007 and have studied the rehabilitative side of massage practicing as a 'Medical Massage Practitioner'. I'd rather be making my own way than letting others take care of me financially. But here I am, unable to work from the immensity of the day-to-day pain. I have a few good days and a few bad days. I had to drop out of university and move back home with my mother due to my illness. I'm not asking anyone to feel sorry for me or having an un-ending pitty party; I divulge this very personal situation because I want anyone who might message me to know that there are extenuating circumstances that control my day to day existence.

In some ways I'm lonely for a companion. I miss having someone to talk to and laugh with and maybe even someone to cuddle with. I would love to have a sex life but right now that feels really impossible. Even more now because of how my health limits my abilities, I only want to get involved with someone who values more than just sex. While I am very sexually driven, Sex is a beyond body experience for me; when I make love to my partner I am making an physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual connection. It's a powerful, hard to describe feeling, like leaving your body and yet being aware of the tiniest sensations and stimuli... It has a lot to do with passion, but I digress.

I am seeking someone who is also an intellectual, someone who takes pleasure in learning, in experiencing new things and having deep conversation about anything and everything. So far it seems such people are rare and the last two people I met able to match my passion and intellectual abilities deeply hurt me... The more I get hurt the harder it gets to open myself to the possibility of finding love again. So I just ask you not to play with me, if you don't have a serious interest in finding someone to build and share a life with then it might be best if you just not play with my heart like its a toy you can toss aside at will.

I've met others who share my disease and many of them have reported that people they thought loved them left them over their illness. This has taught me that I can't burden anyone with my illness and even though I have the greatest desire to live and love fully and deeply but I'm limited. I have to be careful who comes in my life.

I am a good girl with a big heart. Treat me with respect and I will return the same courtesy. So again, do not even bother talking to me if all you want is mindless sex.

There is ALWAYS a lot going on in my head and my life.
I'm a deep thinker and I take pleasure in my creativity and intelligence. I'm an intellectual and good stimulating conversation makes me happy. More often than not I start the conversation and dominate it. (I try not to, just can't help it when talking to non-intellectuals or non-conversationalists). I'm witty, sarcastic and my humor can be a bit dry. I find humor in everything and I know how to laugh at myself even though I take myself seriously. I'm self motivated, and independently spirited.
What I’m doing with my life
I've had to put my educational goals on hold recently due to be diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/Fibromyalgia in conjunction with Degenerative Disc Syndrome. I went from high school to Lone Star Community College before I transferred into Texas A&M University to pursue two bachelors of science degrees in nutritional sciences and horticulture. I'm deeply fascinated with the human body and how it interacts with its environment, but I had to reconsider my long term educational plans to potentially finish my bachelors and aim for med school due my health issues pulling my life apart....
:( I used to work out as much as I could as often as I had the energy to do so but the energy to run 5 miles 5 days a week isn't there at the moment. Since January 2016, I've been pushing my body to rebuild my strength and endurance; I got a FitBit from Christmas and do my best to get to the YMCA 3-5times a week with a 5mile/10,000 step goal daily. I used to love getting on a treadmill or an elliptical machine and run till I was tired but that's much much harder these days with my Fibromyalgia.
On a good day, I like to play pool. Nights in playing board games are awesome. I love to write for my own personal enjoyment; I am currently writing a novel of the conspiracy thriller genre that I pray will get published and do well. One of my good friends says I need to write erotic novels for a living but eh, we shall see.... Maybe one day I'll make money off that talent. I'm always open to meeting new people with similar interests and trying new things or 'educational' experiences. Museums anyone?
I’m really good at
Puzzles, games or anything based on logic. Not so much math, but logic and probability. I LOVE Board games. Always love new board game buddies. I'm a pretty good cook if I do say so myself. It depends on the day how good I am at it, but I love to play pool! Play with me? lol jk. Depending on your definition of dancing, that is negotiable too. :) I'm good at checkers, NOT CHESS. Figure that one out. *grins and laughs* :)
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm told I can be very intimidating, though I do not intend to be. I think it has to do with my confidence and that my determination to get things done and so forth without mincing words tends to push people away...I speak abruptly but I mean nothing by it, no harm.

Generally be prepared for anything to come out of my mouth. I wish I had more shame, but I don't.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books, I shall never be able to express the value of every printed page I read! I read more non-fiction than fiction and I'd have to check my Shelfari Bookshelf to even remember what I've read lately but for starters, I love The Great Gatsby, Wuthering Heights, Twilight (the whole series especially book 3), Wicked (though I've only read four of the books in the series), Jemima J, Mr. Maybe, Fourplay, The House Next door, THe Works of Edgar Allen Poe. Most of my nonfiction books are along the topics of health, nutrition, medicine, social sciences, politics, etc. I tend to read several books at once and here's my current list: "GSH: Your Body's Most Powerful Protector Glutathione" by Jimmy Gutman M.D., "Unshackled: ASurvivor's Story" by Kathleen Sullivan; David Livingstone's "Terrorism and the Illuminati", Henry Makow's "Illuminati: The Cult That Hijacked The World" and "Bloodlines of the Illuminati" by Fritz Springmeier to name several.

TV: I Love The Walking Dead, Reign, Monk, Vampire Diaries, The Originals, The Newsroom, Psych, House of Cards, HOUSE M.D., Boston Legal, Scandal, Burn Notice, Royal Pains, CSI Miami, NCIS, Grimm, Castle, Justified, Law & Order SVU, and many more. But there are always a lot of things that are more important than watching TV. I do watch things on Netflix and Youtube, but I usually multi-task and work on various projects while watching/listening to my shows.
Movies, love movies, Comedy, Romance, Historical movies, some fantasy, Action. Love it all but don't really have Favorite movies, just movies I like with actors/actresses I like.

Music I like almost all types except that horrible screaming heavy metal crap people mistakenly call music like kiss or korn... I need some more exposure to classical, but I thoroughly enjoy what I've been exposed to, I like pop, some jazz, hip-hop, SOME rap, alternative, rock, some latin, generally I like most music. Lately I've really been listening to fairly mellow music, therapeutic or cathartic melodies except for when I workout when I need something more upbeat.

Food I'll try anything once. I love sushi, can't stomach mexican food for the most part (only the chips ,tortillas, and queso) and end up eating italian and japanese/chinese ALOT.
The six things I could never do without
Creature Comforts
Laughter
Good Company
Good Books
Great food (dark chocolate... Hot Tea... Chicken Noodle Soup)
Sadly I'm glued to my cell phone and Ipod. So maybe thats seven. oh well.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I tend to think deeply about People, pondering life and the little things that matter. I probably think too much...
On a typical Friday night I am
Probably home, taking care of things and trying to stay out of trouble. What do people actually do on a "typical Friday night"? I don't think I know what that is.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
That I am getting really sick of feeling like the only good males I'll ever have in my life are my two cats. Just feel like every time a man opens his mouth to speak to me bullshit is flying out.

I really crave a deep emotional and mental bond with a person I plan to sleep with, other wise what's the point of real sex with out brain sex? It just doesn't last... I had a long relationship during my adolescence into adulthood with an older guy. He wanted us to get married, me to move to NYC to be with him and I wanted him to grow up. After eight years, I dumped him and ever since I've missed the intimacy you have with someone in a devoted, long term relationship. In the private space of the bedroom when you can be your most vulnerable and passionate the most beautiful experiences can happen. I miss the kisses and making out and I miss the physical warmth of sharing a bed with a good man... ah C'est pas bon mal et C'est la Vie....

I've kinda realized I'm a sucker for tall blue eyed men. Something about blues eyes radiates trustworthiness and yet blue eyed men are the best liars.
You should message me if
if you have high expectation for yourself and those you spend time with then we could talk.
I really thought I had met a great guy on here but wasted two years with a guy whose biggest failing was that he lacked ambition and couldn't handle the stresses people experience when they make a decent effort to better themselves. Message me if you can handle the stress of going to school and working at the same time. Or the stresses of starting your own business. If you have no drive, you are wasting my time.
I've been single again since October 2015 but accidentally left a note in the section till just now stating I had met someone and was not single. I am single and looking for a serious guy. Apologies for the misinformation.
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