38Manhattan, United States
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My self-summary
When I was a kid I picked a spot in my backyard and tried to memorize it. I told myself that if I ever learned how to travel through time, I would set my destination backward to THAT moment. Then I'd wait around for five minutes to see if future me appeared out of nowhere to greet me with sage advice and knowledge of future video games.

A few years later, having forgotten the original time/spot, I tried the same thing again somewhere new. Still nothing. I kept this pattern up every few years, each time certain that it didn't make sense to visit me then, but it was important to come see me now. Who but future me would know what I was going through? Who else could tell me which were the big decisions and which were the small ones?

I think you know where this story goes. I eventually discovered time travel on my own (the secret is rubber bands) but forgot which of my many past selves I was supposed to go back and assist. So now I just use the technology to go back in time and snap selfies with long dead historical figures. They all look so freaked out in the photos, it's hilarious.
What I’m doing with my life
I've recently completed my MFA in creative writing at Columbia University, and now have a solid collection of essays and scripts under my belt. My understanding is agents and publishers should be knocking at my door with offers and opportunities any minute now.

Outside of my current day job I perform improv, organize game nights, camping/hiking/climbing trips, and the occasional nacho crawl. To quote an obscure song I once heard about being addicted to crystal meth, I live a semi-charmed kinda life.

I got into live storytelling a few years back, and got one of my stories professionally animated, which was awesome. I now desperately want to get some animators indebted to me forever so I can get my entire life recreated as the world's longest (and only semi-entertaining) cartoon.

I also purchased a Fitbit recently and have become a little obsessed with not only "gettin' my steps in," every day but also "crushing the step competition." Give me meters to fill and some arbitrary competition, and apparently you've hooked me for life.
I’m really good at
I want to say I'm a good listener, but I feel like it's one of those things you're not allowed to say about yourself in earnest. Modern humility is all about taking yourself down a peg while hoping for a positive reaction.

On an unrelated note, I'm terrible in bed.
The first things people usually notice about me
Probably the soul of a man burdened with self-loathing and doubt, with an indescribable longing noticeable during those brief moments when the mask is lowered and the pathos slips into view.

Update: I'm told my bald head is more noticeable. LOL!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
You guys, I love so many things. Here's a random sampling:

Kurt Vonnegut, Ben Folds (Five), Memento, Emily Blunt, Breaking Bad, Calvin & Hobbes, The Get Up Kids, Improvised Shakespeare, Jessica Jones, Tobias Wolff, Game of Thrones, Groundhog Day, James Baldwin, Radiolab, The Iron Giant, Miyazaki, Dan Harmon (Community, Rick & Morty), classic Simpsons, East of Eden, Motion City Soundtrack, David Sedaris, Mad Men, This American Life.

Also, as a lifelong New Yorker, I'm pretty spoiled when it comes to food. I have a particular fondness all things spicy and sweet.
Six things I could never do without
-My job.
-The money I get from my job.
-The things I buy with the money I get from my job.
-The comforts that come from the things I buy with the money I get from my job.
-The happiness that's triggered from the comforts that come from the things I buy with the money I get from my job.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The haters. Are they always just gonna hate?
On a typical Friday night I am
Taking a much needed break from doomsday preppin'.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I started a fan club for myself when I was 12. It sounds like the most narcissistic thing a person could do, I know, but it was a joke. Mostly. And I kept this joke up - with monthly newsletters and all - for about 8 years.
You should message me if
You know the female part of "I Gotta Man," and you're not afraid to sing it in a karaoke bar.
The two of us