29Ballwin, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
WARNING. This profile sucks, don't read it unless you want to be upset that you read it

MATT THOUGHTS: so many women mention the Oxford comma on here. I'm totally going to use it only SOMETIMES just to mess with those of you who are window-shopping my profile.

I'm Matt. I like to spend my free time reading my shiny DSM-5, so push up them glasses. I'm super easy to talk to, and I barely know the meaning of the word offended. I like to sing along to the music. I like emotion. I like empathizing. I like experiencing. I like e-words.

QuikTrip has a home-like feel to it for me. Dat tea. I get objectified for my sexy sensitive side and not-too-strong-yet-salient vulnerability (sup ladies I'm macho as fuck). I would make a decent voice actor for a soldier character in a video game. I pop huge for lame jokes, kittens, and cute head accessories (this isn't about erections or zits).

I'll debate characters, cinematography, editing and dialogue any day. Stream of consciousness is cool. People tell me I know things and give good insight. I want to visit basically every country at this point.

According to the how-old.net thing, I look 40, so I've got that going for me, which is nice

I glanced up at the basic description under my username and it says "Man". First thing I thought of: https://youtu.be/FIwSeLldZqY?t=16

yo fuck okcupid puttin me on blast saying I'm less suave. I'll smooth-talk them pants...right back on. Because I'm not suave.
What I’m doing with my life
Favorite food: Milk steak.
Favorite hobby: Magnets. Just magnets.
Likes: Ghouls. You know, funny little green ghouls.
Dislikes: People's knees.
I’m really good at
Hair, embarrassingly bad dance moves, braining and doing words. Directions and navigating. (Looking back on this addition to my profile, it's probably the sexiest of the "I'm good at's")

I'm not so good at:

Spin moves. Listening to music quietly. Staying awake. Formatting. Containing my sick flow.
The first things people usually notice about me
Some guy asked me if I live in my mother's basement the other day, so I guess people first notice that I look like a failure.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Newest purchase- John Dies at the End. I have Game of Thrones and a DSM-5. Also books about dreams, binge eating, and emotional intelligence. this guy fucks, right

Movies: "My favorite movie is books"- Tom N. Haverford

American Beauty, The Departed, The Empire Strikes Back, Collateral, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, The Dark Knight Trilogy. Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World. Lord of the Rings. Aladdin. A bunch of others. I like movies where the actors aren't the only thing telling the story.

EDIT: Hahaha, I just realized I had TMNT on here. Better leave it out of respect to my younger self. You can't deny the amazingness of a little baby turtle excitedly exclaiming "RADICAL RADICAL RADICAL!"

Amazing TV Shows: 24. Battlestar Galactica. Game Of Thrones. Lost. Futurama. Louie. Community. The Office. Seinfeld. The League. Homeland. Friends. Scrubs. Parks and Recreation. Sons of Anarchy. Breaking Bad. Workaholics.
Arrested Development. The Walking Dead.

I've been known to like some real lame shit too.

Music: are you sure you're ready for this conversation

(this is what i can remember off the top of my head)

Andrew WK
Arcade Fire
The Black Keys
Cage the Elephant
Childish Gambino
Circa Survive
Coheed and Cambria
The Dead Weather
The Decemberists
Fall Out Boy
The Fratellis
Foo Fighters
Julian Casablancas
Kanye West
Kid Cudi
Lupe Fiasco
The Mars Volta
Minus the Bear
Nico Vega
The Offspring
Porcupine Tree
Queens of the Stone Age
Rage Against The Machine
Red Hot Chili Peppers
Silversun Pickups
The Strokes
System of a Down
Talking Heads
Thank You Scientist
Them Crooked Vultures
The White Stripes

(It's okay that you scroll-skipped that)

Food: yeah i like that shit
Six things I could never do without
In an order to be determined at a later time

Iced Tea, Unsweetened- Tha flava. If I find a girl who likes it as much as me, she's going to be my wife.

the internet- so connected to news, socializing, science, and dank memes

conversation- I loooove to blab

sudden break-outs into dance in inappropriate venues- Preferably poor dancing

music- I like to listen to it kinda.

friends- El Generico answer.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The wondrous intricacies of rock music and it's effect on emotions. If it's a hip hop song, the lyrical genius I'm inevitably experiencing. It's okay, I want to punch me too.

Emotions in general. I love to understand people below the surface. hah gaaaay

Sexuality; most especially how to further positivity towards women's sexualities. But like as a society, and not in a creepy way. Empowerment baybeeeeeee

I believe every single person in the world has a unique superpower, and that it's either extremely mundane or we haven't discovered how to access it yet. Like. "Oh, Dave's super power is keeping track of more than 5 tabs on a browser at once"

How to maximize my time spent awake.

The tattoo I'm going to get next.
On a typical Friday night I am
act like i have a life
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
As I'm exiting Chipotle, a pretty woman walks up to the door. I hold it open for her and she smiles, makes eye contact, and says with enthusiasm, "thank you!"

I think in my head, "no problem."

I say "Nope."

She frowns and walks in before I realize how single I am.
You should message me if
If you're smart. Seriously, bring the right form of your with your message or we are throwing down. Okay maybe not, but I may find you less attractive if you pronounce it nuke-u-lur.

If you are witty. Witty = charming.

If you're a little outside the box. Dope cliché usage here, the irony isn't lost on me

If you're awesome at communicating.

If you wanna watch TV together and then maybe go hike a trail afterward.

If you like conversations, and having them.

But really idk, if you're cool and you don't steal from old people or other nefarious shit, get at me

The two of us