37Oakville, Canada
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My self-summary
tl;dr: I enjoy long walks on the beach and candle-lit dinners.

I am quiet. private. i don't post frequent updates about my life on twitter/facebook. I doubt i'll ever inform the world of when I am pooping. sorry if that's a turn-off (the infrequent updates, not the poop).

I eat the majority of my meals in my sleep. I will wake up in the middle of the night, walk into my kitchen, grab whatever's convenient, take it back to my bed and chow down -- barely conscious and with my eyes closed!

I actively help people out, and then feign bewilderment when they thank me. Yes, I like to play the white knight and run to people's aid. I understand that Bruce Willis' character John McClane in Die Hard turned out to be an alcoholic, poor husband and dysfunctional dad, but i swear i'm not completely one-dimensional!

I often fantasize about being in a team-player type relationship, where we would make dinner together, side-by-side. I have nightmares about coming home from work with dinner already on the table.

Seeing babies cry makes me smile. mommy won't buy you that candy? Awww! tooooo baaaad

humour: self-deprecation and hyperbole. don't be surprised if I reduce everything to ridiculously absurd proportions.

Someone once told me that they 'kept an open mind'. I thought that was cool. A few years later, someone else told me that if you keep your mind wide open, your brain will fall out. I didn't particularly like that idea so much, so it's been locked shut inside my cavernous cranium ever since. it rattles from time-to-time.

I don't think I have celiac disease, but I am lactose intolerant. Monsanto isn't all that bad; it's unfortunate that the whole overpriced "whole foods" movement is under attack by pollinating, genetically modified alfalfa, but all the politics involved is so misleading that I've grown irritable for having to fact-check every claim that's being made. i.e. please -- for the love of god! -- let's have a sensible discussion on food politics, if you're into that stuff.

Also, cilantro tastes like dish soap to me. That's too bad, I heard great things about it!

As a bonus, I do know the difference between there, their, and they're. also: it's/its, and whose/who's, who/whom, and so on. i also get feelings of cleverness when I actually use them in a sentence.

The serious: I'd consider myself a skeptic, and non-believer of anything wacky or supernatural; that includes a wide variety, from alternative medicine (homeopathy, acupuncture, chiropractic) to mystical thinking (psychics, horoscopes, and astrology). If you -- put 'it's fun to think about' beside your astrological sign; compare your sign with mine, seeking compatibility; use it to determine my personality; or simply idolize your magic eight-ball, then please move on. I'm actually astonished that it is the 21st century and people are still quite amused by this branch of pseudoscience. having said that, my active stance on the subject has waned from argumentative to blatant avoidance.

For those who might say, "..but Rich, it's not hurting anyone!" Yes it is true, but I have bore witness to people dedicating their lives to a lie, and also confiding in psychics, who in turn, dictate how their lives should play out (i.e. they play god). it is this dishonesty that I abhor.
What I’m doing with my life
Some of the titles I currently hold: physics undergrad, uncle (x4), produce clerk, goat herder.

My current life involves a broken washer; and the current dilemma is whether I should walk down the street to use one of my slumlord's many other washers -- or head over to walmart for a new pack of underwear. Today, I chose the former.
I’m really good at
getting sidetracked, tangents, free association, random blurting, steering, veering, and leering [see below].
The first things people usually notice about me
My eyes--because i tend to stare, more like leer, off into the distance (which also happens to be in the same direction where you're standing!). It's creepy, i know, but you're just in the way okay.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Idols and Inspirations:

Neil Degrasse Tyson, the late Christopher Hitchens, Brian Cox, Derren Brown, and last but certainly not least, Lera Boroditsky.

authors: Camus, Orwell, and Vonnegut.

movies: Growing up, The Emerald Forest and Army of Darkness.
recently: Primer, Life Aquatic, Moon, Mud, Ruby Sparks

Music: The Beastie Boys, The Prodigy, DJ Shadow. which sums up what i listen to -- instrumental hiphop, chillout and electro.

shows: The Wonders of Life.

Food: garden veggie or greek style pizza, green olives, felafel, coconut-lime soup, spicy peanut padthai/stirfry, mixing my tabooleh with the rice and tzatziki (mega-thorough mixing)
Six things I could never do without
-T3 for when I slip on the ice and hurt my back.
-my toaster for toasting toast (still sealed in box).
-cheese on sale for $4.44 at No Frills.
-my coffee maker, which uncle Tom had graciously given me last christmas.
-The stove.
-The fridge -- it keeps stuff cold.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I think about how I didn't water my mini-rose for 3 days and it died on me. i feel a deep sense of remorse for neglecting it.

if we had four fingers, instead of ten, would 2+2=10 and 4,5,6,7,8,9 never have been invented??

the combined carbon foot-print that vegetarians&vegans put upon this world. man-made global warming, indeed!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
My current toothbrush is purple. it came in a multi-pack. it doesn't faze me, but i'm sure my roommates make fun of me.

I have a massive phobia of static shocks. You will probably see me attempting to discharge myself via any metal object within proximity. metal door handles: i'll either cover my hand with my sleeve, or whack it a few times before fully placing my hand on it.

If you shock me, it's over. I'm serious!!!1
You should message me if
you want to talk shit and call me names and make me cry.
The two of us