I love music from indierock to freejazz to country and most points in between (barring Dancehall, reggaeton, nu-metal, and screamo), reading and writing (feel free to judge my written works here: http://chickenwaffles.blogspot.com), coffee, movies with more talking and sex than killing and maiming, stand-up comedy, playing my own music and recording it, long drives down winding roads to unknown destinations, mixtapes/mix cds to listen to for those drives, hanging out with my friends, being a media mogul and going to rock shows when I can.
I don't like feet, and tattooed feet really freak me out. But not as much as toe-rings.
Having said that, I'd prefer that you do actually have feet, because I saw that episode of "My Name Is Earl" with the girl with the plastic flippers where feet should go and it just made me laugh a lot.
I am cynical, irreverent, and a useless romantic
I'm a writer and a DJ who mostly gets (under)paid to slice meats and cheeses and scoop food at your local Whole Foods Market. My schedule is erratic, which kinda blows, because on the occasion I get a weekend night off, I probably have to be at work at 6am the next day. But I do enjoy the job and the people I work with, and my everyday situations do inspire weird little ditties.
Currently, I'm writing (maybe not enough) a book that's taking me ten years longer than I wanted it to. I hope it's worth it. Mostly, I just want to finish it to feel a sense of accomplishment. If I can get it published and made into a movie, well, then maybe I can just DJ for a living after that.
Once I've actually gotten the book done, I'm planning on adapting it into a screenplay as well as promoting it via podcasts and a one-man show.
I also have a radio show on 90.1 FM WUSB (http://wusb.fm/jro for playlists and links to listen) on alternate wednesday afternoons from 2:30-5pm. I also host/DJ a Bring Your Own Vinyl (BYOV) Night at a local watering hole. It's a lot of fun and it's always nice to drink for free AND get paid to play records. Looking to expand to other establishments in the near future, too!
Looking to get back into school for Archiving (MLS) in the next couple years...pondering a move to Pittsburgh (I still have to visit before I make a decision to put down roots, but if you're from Pittsburgh and wondering why some guy from NY is looking at you, it's because I wanted to see what kind of single ladies live there, because I doubt I'm gonna meet anyone up here who wants to move in six months) because I can easily transfer through my job and Pitt has the #6 Archiving program in the US.
Being the kind of DJ I am. I make connections between songs and artists you may not have thought about. I get obsessed.
cooking. I love to cook and try new things. I really don't get why I'm single, since I do cook really well AND am not a bad looking guy. (update: I think it's because I am uncomfortable when a woman pays positive attention to me. Something about not wanting to be a part of any club that would have me as a member. Oops).
Trivial Pursuit. Pretty much any edition. Making mixtapes, recommending music you will like (unless you're weird) based on other things you like.
My real-life superpower is that I can find a great restaurant anywhere, even without the aid of the internet, even in a city I'm unfamiliar with (like Chicago).
Hopefully, making you laugh.
Probably that I dress like Bruce McCulloch from the Kids In The Hall.
That I look pretty young for a guy who is 40 (holy fuck, I'm 40! How did that happen?).
Also, people always think I look like someone they know. I swear to you that I am NOT Simon (whoever that is). I am also not whoever Bill Klein is.
Books: anything by Kurt Vonnegut, most of Chuck Palahniuk's ouevre (I thought Invisible Monsters was weak, but that Diary was genius), a good deal of Don Delillo (I still can't get through Libra, though), Nick Hornby (especially High Fidelity), Raymond Carver., It Feels So Good When I Stop and Meat Is Murder by Joe Pernice, Talking to Girls About Duran Duran and Love Is a Mixtape by Rob Sheffield, Rat Girl by Kristin Hersh, anything by Sarah Vowell, Alice Fantastic by Maggie Estep, Mysteries of Pittsburgh and Wonder Boys by Michael Chabon...so many more..
Movies: I like a lot of 80s films and indie films from the 90s, as well as the classics by Hitchcock and Welles, etc. I don't watch as many films as I used to, though. My favorites are pretty much anything by Cameron Crowe, Terry Gilliam, Mel Brooks, Hal Hartley, Wes Anderson, Guy Maddin, David Lynch, Todd Solondz, etc. Also: Better Off Dead, One Crazy Summer, Real Genius, High Fidelity, Tao of Steve...
TV: Orphan Black, Gotham, Bored To Death, Party Down, How I Met Your Mother, Peep Show, The IT Crowd, Coupling (UK), Bob Newhart Show, Newhart, Whitest Kids U'Know, Flight Of The Conchords, Kids In the Hall, Fringe, Supernatural, Archer, Big Bang Theory, MST3K, SCTV, Twin Peaks, Six Feet Under, Dead Like Me, Reaper, Pushing Daisies, Seinfeld, Simpsons, Kitchen Confidential, Chopped, Iron Chef, Black Adder, Monty Python's Flying Circus, South Park, Futurama, Ed, Friends, Twitch City, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Space Ghost Coast To Coast, The Brak Show, Sealab 2021, Frisky Dingo, Sledge Hammer, Welcome Back Kotter, Taxi, Arrested Development, Gilmore Girls, Wonderfalls, Dawson's Creek, Sliders, Spaced, Sports Night, Upright Citizens Brigade, Strangers With Candy, The State, It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, Get Smart, The Loop, 30 Rock, Steven Banks Home Entertainment Center, Big Love, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Robot Chicken, The League, Parks and Rec, Maron, Bob's Burgers, Drunk History...
Music (warning: I am a music nerd. Facebook couldn't even handle the "A" section of my artists): recently, I've been having a hard time keeping current because of work. I'm currently behind on the acquisition of the latest records by The Decemberists, Courtney Barnett, and several others I'm blanking on. Mostly, I've been digging through my immesnse backlog of records (real vinyl LPs - I'm a nerd) - my "to be listened to" stack is now several shelves deep (I just added a ton more recently). I also like a lot of awesome local bands from LI, whom I occasionally play on my radio show. I will be going to shows this summer such as: The Swirlies, Archers of Loaf, Ride, New Pornographers, Joe Henry, etc. Hopefully more, but this all depends on my job.
All-time favorites include Bob Dylan, The Beatles, Beach Boys, Pink Floyd, Velvet Underground/Lou Reed, Tom Waits, Guided By Voices, Camper Van Beethoven, Neil Young, Pavement, Sebadoh, Archers of Loaf, The Mountain Goats, Robyn Hitchcock, Big Star, Richard Thompson, Okkervil River, The Hold Steady, The Wedding Present, Slowdive, Unrest, Versus, Karl Hendricks Trio, Spacemen 3, JAMC, and a bunch of others few people have ever heard of. I also love 60's soul/R&B (Motown, Stax/Volt, etc) and wish I had more time to listen to everything...
Why women like those stupid beanpole hipsters who wear girls pants. If I wore those pants, it would mean that I didn't have a member.
Why Members Only made jackets, but not pants, because isn't that where the members go? In the pants? And then you could tell someone to "take off your Members Only pants and jacket." Tee hee giggle.
When will civilization completely collapse?
Why do all my favorite tv shows get canceled?
Will I ever finish my novel?
You actually laughed at the Members Only joke above. (Note - Nobody laughs at the Members Only joke, nobody. -- Ed.)
You think going for drinks or coffee right away is better than building your hopes up through awesome emails, only to find you don't spark. Or you want to maybe get sushi/seafood and/or do a pub quiz with me.
If you are likely to use food as singing props, hit me up. I was watching How I Met Your Mother and they showed the mother making an english muffin sing and I think I'm looking for that in my life. Mostly because I make up stupid songs for everything, too.