from down south. no accent but i still say "y'all." other pronouns: he/him/his.
while i'm not just on this thing to pick up hot babes, i'm very iffy on boyfriend/girlfriend heteronormative relationships. i'm attracted to independence, i believe friendship can overlap with making out and cuddling, and i don't wanna own yr body or time. these do not preclude my getting totally sweet on people but basically i am trying to practice ethical, considerate, feminist nonmonogamy.
currently looking mostly for people with whom i click intellectually/emotionally, who are also interested in "casual sex" type makeouts, fool-arounds, n maybe kink stuff. not looking for a primary partner, but strongly desirous of building real friendships of which pushing each other's buttons is one part.
professionally a nerdperson, intermittently struggling to hold myself to a critical historiographical praxis in a notoriously conservative field. aka, phd student. as i write this i am using okcupid as one of many ways to procrastinate working on my prospectus. sigh.
the second- or third-most heartwarming compliment i've ever received was an ex-lover telling me i made her feel comfortable in her desires. aww, yay!
the gray hairs have started to show here and there, and part of me is pretty stoked about it.
books: nerdy nonfiction, virginia woolf, old x-men, pulpy garbage.
movies: kiki's delivery service plus whatever you wanna watch. i got a film forum membership to try and motivate myself to see more things, give a holler if you wanna see a flick.
tv shows: for the sake of my own happiness i try to avoid getting hooked on these but, key reference points include mst3k, futurama, columbo, old simpsons, twin peaks.
music: anything that you can sing along to with giant emotions, great tunes, good words. 50s rock, classic country, 70s AM gold, funk, chart pop and hip-hop, classic beatles-y pop-rock. been poking into jazz in a very tentative way. the past two years have seen me become one of those types who frequently listens to steely dan and yes.
food: pancakes, tibetan fried momos, thai stuff, little debbies.
* record player
* stupid computer
* all my dear sweet inspirational friends, now scattered across the earth
2) i've seen many a profile proclaim: "don't message me if you just want to talk dirty to me." i kind of take the opposite stance on this issue.
3) i have unusual turn-ons, swinging strongly subby. the groovy radical nerd wing of the local kink scene has been kind enough to welcome me as a novice and interloper; if you do fetlife we can swap details that way too. i don't need all my partners to be kinky but if you are more squeamish about this stuff we might not be such a great match.
i've tried to sum my stuff up by saying "i like it dirty," but this has been widely misunderstood. let's say "REALLY dirty" and get into the details later. use me gleefully; leave me filthy, with brains a-scrambled.
4) BUT. things don't always have to be so elaborate. i also like making out and groping and sweaty bodies rolling and squirming around together. oouuh!
you wanna get dirty. like, let's.
you're inspired to. i have next to zero first-message game anyway.
you wanna go exploring by bike or subway, especially to architecture and urban spaces.
you are not some career-driven money zombie person and do not measure people by the dollars attached to their clothes, their drinks or their hangouts. my home is still with the DIY kids, even tho they're all a lot cooler than me.
you wanna have yr picture taken. i do decent portraits though most of my experience is with dumb buildings.
you wanna ball and yr not shy.