If you never heard it you should try it
A email to a friend true story and funny shit!!
This will make your night I'm sure ...I just need to get this off my chest ..share my bad date with you I guess ..or maybe just feel the need to talk about it ....I met a girl ..kinda like her ..cute ..funny ..smart ..two dates in so far so good ...she calls and ask me out for date three I agree and that's when shit got weird .she Says ..I want to share something special to me with you ..I want you to go somewhere with me..will you ?. I say yes ..lets go ..ok meet me at 465 and washington @ 930 ..ok ..I go there ..she drives from there ..makes a call ( yes I have him ..yea ..I do like him ..he's my little crouch rocket ..) Hangs up ..they can't wait to meet you ..I act like I didn't hear anything .takes me to some wooded ass jungle like place ..there are other cars there ..we get out ..hear nothing ..but can see a glow in the woods ..walk a path to the fire ..there's food and drink their smoking ..I don't smoke but what ever I note I'm the only other then white person there ..then some one said its almost 945 guys ..so everyone gets up and starts moving chairs ..I ask what's going on ...this guy says its time ..look ...dude ..I'm half Black ..I sound white ..but I am still half black ...time for what mother fucker ..time to discharge your stone ...stone ??I don't have a stone ..he hands me one .its time for the dark moon ..wtf ?? These mother fuckers start chanting and praying and shit ..I'm thinking what kinda unholy ass place is this ..bitches dancing around the fire like a bunch of mother fucking aborigines ..where the fuck am I ?I summand the powers of gray skull and throw stone with the force of one thousand winds...This shit goes on for like 20, min or so ...all at once it stops ...I'm thinking ..ok ..Paul is the biggest one ..I'll take him out first ..then the others will fall like dominos..everyone starts packing up ...she goes hey Ein you want to go to ( someone's ) house for some real fun ? Hell nah !! Bitch !! What's there ?? The motherfucking alter of sacrifice take my half breed ass back to my god dam car !! (On our way ) did you like it ..I say o yea ..see my car hop out ..her car was still rolling as I opened my door ..don't forget to call and say you made it home safe ..I will ..drive home at very high rate of fuel consumption...get home ..nervous as fuck !! Did I just join a cult ?? Did i just trade my soul for a rock ???Are they making voo doo dolls and shit right now ?? Did Jesus see me there doing that shit ??block her on phone on computer on kik ..considered changing my fucking name ..this was Thur night .sat night I decided to talk with her ..a little ...go to my sister house Sunday morning ..she has a poddle ..it has always barked at me ..open her gate ..little dog make an attempt to take my fucking life ..chews at my legs and ankle with the speed and confidence of a samurai warrior .I had to run away from this 3 pound homacidal maniac ..i decide never to speak to that girl ever again..ever
As you can see I sent a copy of that to my sister ..I'm sure she would like to know why VAVA ( little monsterest dog ) really bit me ...