32San Francisco, United States
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My self-summary
My pals have said this: sharp-tongued, creative, energetic, dapper, vampiric, crazy, risk-taking, adventurous, loyal, thoughtful. So if these people are painting me an inspired, free-wheeling madman vampire with a golden heart, I suppose I can do nothing but nod.

I used to be a cynic. Now I'm cautiously an optimist. I used to be an introvert. I've been perverted into a modest extrovert.

Incurable wanderlust; my soul is restless. If I could wander the earth forever, I would. If I could visit the moons of Jupiter, I'd do that too. Maybe not Mars: it's an ice cold version of Nevada. Without Las Vegas. I'd do Venus but would stay high as a kite in the cloud tops. I lived abroad in India for awhile, but it's time to stay put and get my kicks in other ways.

I love being turned on to feeling in a time when it's simple to feel nothing.

"I don't fuck much with the past but I fuck plenty with the future." -Patti Smith

"Hear no evil, speak no evil, and you'll never be invited to a party." -Oscar Wilde
What I’m doing with my life
I'm paid decently to corrupt the minds of teenagers by entertaining them with stories while fixing their grammar.

Someone described my novel once as a "nihilist fairy-tale with cyber-punk tendencies." My novella features flying saucers, war forks, spandex, a hermaphrodite princess, and a moon orgy. One of these is the thesis for my MA, and the other is the thesis for my MFA--I'm enrolled in both cause I always bite off too much. Why you do dis?

I am the duke of three cafes: Foglifter, Mission Creek, and La Boheme. Triple dog dare you. 10/90 ominous/awesome.
I’m really good at
Writing: I'm pretty involved in this now so I hope that's true.

Singing: I used to sing in a bar band in SoCal and get drunk for free a lot. My best moment: at a double 30th birthday party, once I stopped rolling on the floor and put my shirt back on, I sang Bowie's Young Americans by heart and killed it. That very well may have been my peak.

Jenga: I've never lost. Not regular Jenga, not giant Jenga, not even regular or giant jenga shitfaced or high as a kite.

Omelettes: I'll make one of the best omelettes you've ever had, campaign promise.
The first things people usually notice about me
I wear nice shirts and shit stompers.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Take a gamble with five all-time favorites:

So I love music of many genres that is melodically interesting, takes risks, and is performed like the world will end tomorrow.

I make lots of playlists with arbitrary but entertaining rules. Here are the titles of some recent ones:
Can You Dance, Bobby? : A Collection of Thirty Optimistic and Nihilistic Dance Songs
Now THAT'S What I Call The Apocalypse! Vol. 5
Taking a Trip, Jon? : Music for Daytripping
Why so Furious? : Forty Years of Revenge

Authors I love: Marquez, Samuel Beckett, Kurt Vonnegut, Robert Walser, Angela Carter, Ernest Hemingway, Roberto Bolano, Franz Kafka, Philip K. Dick, Oscar Wilde, Albert Camus, Hunter S. Thompson, Ray Bradbury...

Current shows: Breaking Bad, Mad Men, Dexter. But no mas TV.

Favorite movies: all Terry Gilliam, all Stanley Kubrick, Akira, Elfen Lied, Paprika, everything by Miyazaki, Aliens, Metropolis (both of them), Life of Brian, Delicatessen, Buffalo 66, Control, There Will be Blood, Boogie Nights, Titus, AI...

Games: I AIN'T GOT TIME FOR GAMES. But I'm a life long gamer of all sorts.
Recent: Small World, Carcassonne (school you :P), XCom, Mass Effect, Team Fortress 2, Civilization V. We'll reminisce on the blood thirsty classics.

Food: I will try any food. The raunchier, the better. I'm a food tourist!
Six things I could never do without
1. Music
2. Women
3. Love
4. Sex
5. A way to write
6. Frivolous reasons to break rules
7. Black coffee
8. Chocolate
9. Orange juice
10. Boots
11. Leather jackets
12. Countries I've yet to visit
13. LSD
14. Strawberry milkshakes
I spend a lot of time thinking about
...where I can still find a pack of dark chocolate M&Ms. What, the, fuck. Nobody sells them anymore!
On a typical Friday night I am
...doing what I can.

"No sympathy for the devil; keep that in mind. Buy the ticket, take the ride." -Hunter S. Thompson
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I used to have a debilitating fear of heights. But then I faced it, not thrice but just twice, and now I feel fine.

I don't have the internet at home. I realize that is easily the craziest thing about my life, never mind the sex, drugs, and rock and roll.

I take genuine pride and enjoyment in sweeping a floor.
You should message me if love music more than life.'d like to grabbabeer. (I'm saying that like Ron Swanson)'re a serious writer in the bay. Walk with me into the drawing room, comrade, we have much to discuss... want to share a cup of coffee and shoot the ish. like going to diners for milkshakes at 3:30 am. are Emilie Simon. We'll drink absinthe at my favorite bar and talk about octopuses, then I'll convince you to buy a Swarmatron, do mime, write you a poem, and take you dancing by the cliffside.
The two of us