When I went to Beyond Wonderland (a multi-day EDM festival with camping), the hottest thing I observed was a girl telling her bf: "This morning, I had this insight." I love observing the world, realizing new things about ourselves, and talking about it. Just last weekend, I went to a three day workshop about relationships, lots of interesting insights and games.
Physical affection is important to me: During 850+ hours of massage training, I've learned a lot about the language of touch. Countless Argentine Tango dances, the dance that's an extended 15 minute hug, have taught me a lot about connection. I love acroyoga. I love sex. If you are going on this ride, you better love human touch.
You'll find me seven days a week at the gym. About three days of yoga, one day of fun group class, and the rest with strength building, agility, cardio, running, and heavy bag training. Outside of the gym, I do twice a week acroyoga. At home, I have my own yoga practice before going to sleep. That's a subtle hint that I'm not a 420 couch potato.
Once or twice a week, I got to a sex positive personal growth group that's about building more connection and getting in touch with our desires.
There is a whole bunch of every once in a while activities:
- Camp at about 3 transformative festivals a year (Lucidity Festival, Lightning in a Bottle, Serenity Gathering, Envision Festival).
- Write fiction (over 100 pieces from short stories to novels).
- Go off roading with my Rubicion Jeep.
- Dance Argentine Tango (primarily), Bachata, and Salsa.
- Canyoneering (aka rappel down waterfalls).
- Lead hikes with the Sierra Club.
- Take continuing education classes.
I can fit into very different social environments. I have conservative Christian friends and sex positive friends where we talk at length about the clitoris. I can camp with wild party friends who are high on drugs and with gentle creatures who live pure.
Because I'm tall, I can be intimidating to people. In one comedy improv class, a girl once raised her hand to complain how towering and scary I am to be in a scene with. All the girls in class chimed in because they felt like that as well. The teacher smiled calmly and said that it can be an asset to have impact. And going out, friends sometimes notice melting looks in girls' eyes when they see me. Some girls are turned on by dominance, and I like that.
My own food is definitely my strong preference. There is something special about the food after spending hours with it in the kitchen. Of course, the first tries of a recipe sometimes end up in the trash.
#1 MEET A NEW FRIEND
I like meeting new people. If we can skip the time consuming texting back and forth, I'm happy to meet about anyone for the chance to meet a new and unique person. If we do something fun, it guarantees that the hour will be fun for both of us.
Here are some fun things to do together:
- Go to an acroyoga class.
- Go to a rock climbing gym.
- Go to Sunday Session in Grand Park (a free electronic music concert; happens three times this summer).
- Go to Glen Ivy hot spring resort near Corona.
- Go to the Sunday afternoon pool party at the Standard downtown.
- Rappel at Stony Point (I have all the gear.).
- Dance Argentine Tango at a Milonga or simply share headphones and dance at the beach.
- Practice sharibari is always a fun, if unusual, thing.
#2 Short-Term Dating/Casual Sex
We all know short-term dating is the upscale term for casual sex. Casual sex is this yucky thing. There are a lot of weird experiences. Most people will agree that if given between spending tonight watching a TV show and having great sex, the later is a lot more fulfilling. I have plenty of female friends who despite the flood of dick pics have a hard time finding healthy and good sex. For many guys, sex is simply a a few minutes of humping.
For me, having a connection is important, not some deep soul mate, twenty food date connection. A connection involves being able to be vulnerable with the other person and being received with respect. A connection is a hug where you can really feel the other person and snuggle in.
Sex comes as an extension from I like being around you, I like being close to you, I like touching you, I like feeling that erotic tension, and then I like making you and myself feel good from touching each other to sex. I read your questions. There are plenty of others with a high sex drive who (when without partner) touch themselves a few times a week or every day. Why not make it much higher quality with someone else? Someone who doesn't get clingy or want to make a relationship out of it.
#3 The One
Okay, so you want to be the one. With all the openness to meet people, I do want to find someone for a long-term relationship. There is something about investing into the relationship of someone who is a strong match. Relationships can grow to something wonderful through communication, vulnerability, and shared experiences.
Sometimes, I just wish to wake up in the morning next to someone like minded and go on a day trip together. We are both interested in the same stuff. We both take parts in getting the trip happening: You pack the food, I plan the route, or something. A great experience gets a whole new level of you through sharing.
I've been to a lot of festivals and met great people, took great classes, and danced to rad DJ sets. Though, I'd love to go with a partner, wake up in the tent together, spend an afternoon under a tree - just us two, physically close and enjoying each other's company, and make our tent neighbor's ears stand up from all the naughty noises that we make :)
I do want a kid or two sooner than later. That's a-whole-nother big thing. Though, let's not get too much ahead of ourselves yet. We haven't even said "hi" yet.