27San Francisco, United States
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My self-summary
Hello plebeians, I'm just your average fat shaming, meat-eating, slut shaming cis-male (not really, I'm actually a fan of sluts). 23 year old student of questionable morality, studying to become a corporate drone. I am pretty vulgar at times and my sense of humor can be found offensive. I'm joking most of the time so don't take me seriously, I never take myself seriously either. I am also severely lacking in shame. Primarily German and Lebanese (Allahu Ackbar heil Hitler... be scared Jews).

I'm not a very interesting person, but let's be honest here; neither are you!
I never refuse a homeless person a cigarette if i have one.
What I’m doing with my life
I hunt unicorns for their blood and ivory.

I spend too much time reading news.
I’m really good at
playing poker
making you mad
making breakfast
calculating risk/reward
making da ladies swoon
The first things people usually notice about me
my aura of overwhelming doom
my voice is also really deep
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Hueg metal fan (doom, black, death, thrash)
I'm also into jazz (I've had a huge boner for Tokyo club jazz recently), old hip hop, blues, post rock, funk, classic rock, soul, some electronica and punx
I would list some bands, but you've probably never heard of them. (you're not hip enough obviously)
I'm really into tacos and burritos.
Six things I could never do without
my sense of unwarranted self importance
my dong
dat sticky icky herb
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The conscious and intelligent manipulation of the organized habits and opinions of the masses is an important element in democratic society. Those who manipulate this unseen mechanism of society constitute an invisible government which is the true ruling power of our country. ...We are governed, our minds are molded, our tastes formed, our ideas suggested, largely by men we have never heard of. This is a logical result of the way in which our democratic society is organized. Vast numbers of human beings must cooperate in this manner if they are to live together as a smoothly functioning society. ...In almost every act of our daily lives, whether in the sphere of politics or business, in our social conduct or our ethical thinking, we are dominated by the relatively small number of persons...who understand the mental processes and social patterns of the masses. It is they who pull the wires which control the public mind.
On a typical Friday night I am
I'm either being a loner playing games or out somewhere polluting my liver.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I was born on the winter solstice. Dark and mysterious enough for you?

My eyebrows are sexier than yours and I don't even pluck or trim em.

And I rate everyone 5 stars ;)
You should message me if
you're interested in buying weapons from me after the apocalypse. if you want to try to escape the plantation with me. or if you think you're cool and need someone to put you in your place. if you are aubrey plaza. if you know what realpolitik means. or if you want to learn olympic fencing.

don't message me if you're an opiate addict. seriously, you are inhuman scum. stay the fuck away from me.

BONUS ROUND: if you recognize the bernays quote up there.
The two of us