I'm doing my best to read the whole entire Internet.
I'm quick, curious, playful, adventurous, logical, and self-reliant. And I can rock the hell out of some tight pants.
I make new friends easily, but value the old ones most.
I work in media, and love my work, which almost never feels like work.
I think irony is funnier than sarcasm.
Good at small talk. Better at big talk.
I'm friendly. And a straight shooter.
I am only good at one sport. I play it 6 hours a week.
I pull an all-nighter about once a month.
So far this year I have snuck burritos, Chinese takeout, and cupcakes to friends in the hospital. If I like you and you mess yourself up, I will 100% be there. With snacks.
I still get carded at the LCBO.
I like to know how everything works.
I adore Mexican and Thai food, after I pick out all the big fronds of cilantro and fling them to the wind (or relocate them delicately into a serviette).
I send thank-you notes.
I look people right in the eye.
Functioning well on little sleep.
Public speaking. And karaoke. They're kinda the same thing.
Tracking down your birth parents.
Jumping out of the way of things that people throw at me.
Well, just that once.
I hardly ever watch TV, but I geek out big for Game of Thrones (books and show; I have theories about Jon Snow's lineage), Mad Men, Key&Peele, High Maintenance, and any good film or piece of writing, regardless of genre (lately Ta-Nehisi Coates, Wells Tower, Junot Diaz, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Mallory Ortberg, Zadie Smith). I'll enjoy the hell out of a rare steak, or a bourbon sour, or some high-quality vanilla ice cream, and I eat a huge bowl of cherries every day all summer long.
I avoid packaged ham, televised sports, fake sugar, kidney beans, and the vocal stylings of Sealion Dion. Other than that, yeah, I'd probably try it.
in this golden yellow wood
You are an elegant spambot seeking to write me dreamy weird romantic poetry in exchange for my credit card information.
You're a good communicator, open to new ideas, and comfortable in your body.
You're a critical thinker, but not one of those devil's-advocate dinks who ruin dinner parties.
You have presence.
You have integrity, even when it's hard.
You choose to think and listen and learn about systemic inequalities like racism and misogyny and ableism and transphobia, and you actually do actual things to help improve these problems.
We can take turns being the interesting one.
You're a champion cuddler.
You like a bit of alone time, but overall you prefer good companionship to solitude.
You'd like to play catch in the park with me; I'll bring the football.
You have either a job you love or a side project you love, and you light up when you talk shop.
You are moderate in your use of alcohol, cosmetic enhancements, and clichés.
You deliberately step out of your comfort zone.
You can teach me how to drive stick.
You wonder if the previous sentence was a euphemism.
You have very good instincts, and very clean teeth, and a quiet speaking voice, and a quick wit, and a warm heart, and a calm and comforting presence, and you know how to apologize but you don't do it compulsively, and you smell like a handful of fresh snow, and sometimes you roll up your shirtsleeves and get dirty, and having you in my life makes me excited to wake up and inspired to make things, and we'd talk all night but we keep getting distracted, and perhaps you are unexpectedly strong with the ability to wrassle a wriggling, laughing item that weighs 136 pounds and is ticklish.