52Manhattan, United States
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My self-summary
This being the fifth attempt to somehow make myself sound more interesting to you, rather than simply answer the lame questions, I've decided to buck the system and instead tell you who I am and what I'm currently thinking: I'm challenged to find the right words that will make you feel safe, interested, intrigued, and even compelled to reach out and take a chance on contacting me. I'm sure that you will have type-casted me before you finish reading this, and more than likely, you won't spend the seconds to see what I've done here in creating a smoke screen. And of course, if I blow it in this section and don't keep your attention, you'll likely move on and never get to know all of the truths about me, because likely I'm going to sidestep direct questions here and avoid the adult conversation. This may not be attractive to you, but for those of you who have said in your profile, "I want a guy who is fun and can make me laugh," hopefully you can get a glimpse of what's in store. Trust me - I'm trying to entertain you here, so relax, pour a glass, and enjoy the show.
The net is, I'm a safe, sane, successful, experienced, content, tested, inquisitive, open, and normal guy who you likely would appreciate if we met somewhere - where you could feel my vibe and "get" what I'm all about. Like if you were standing behind me in line at the Whole Foods listening to me banter with the Clerk. Or, we were on the same tour through a haunted house and you got to see me as well as hear me. I'm athletic, work out daily (yoga and elliptical) and respect my body, just as I would appreciate you respecting yours. I spend my work days interacting with all types of aggressive intellects and definitely get labeled as an extrovert...but don't be fooled by that facade... Get to know me and decide for yourself...
What I’m doing with my life
... is pretty much like everyone else in the world - trying to find a balance in everything that I do. I don't take myself too seriously, even though I have a serious job. I likely should be more serious. In fact, I promise to take work more seriously, if that will make you feel better about me and take a chance. But, likely you'll realize that I'm just kidding and am already serious enough. Wait, I'm kidding, I'm never serious.
Or am I...
I’m really good at
... spotting psychos, nut-jobs, head-cases, and fakers from across the room. Hopefully you are good at that too and will know that I'm none of them. But, if you are any of the above and you try to buy me a drink, I'll expose you in front of all of your friends and my family - as I always travel with my family. And your friends. See my point? I'm good.
The first things people usually notice about me
... is that I'm older than I look, and I'm all over the map when it comes to interests and fascinations. I love commitment and dedication, but you'll rarely see me doing the same thing over and over again, unless it involves spending time with you. Or playing with my Clown Puppet collection. If we get real close some day, maybe I'll let you watch.
Yeah, I'm skeeving myself out now...
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
See, this section is designed to make me look like either an intellect, or a putz. But why is it that you see the dopiest meat-headed guys with beautiful women? Do women like putzes? If so, my favorite book is "Curious George Rides A Bike," and my favorite Movie is "Dumb and Dumber." If you are looking for an intellect, then my favorite book is "The Bible" (King James Version, natch,) and my favorite show is "The History Of Earth" on "The National Geographic Channel."

Are you really going to form your opinion of me based on what I mindlessly do to take me away from the complexity of my day? Would you judge me if I told you that I love vegging out to some Crab Fishing show that allows me to not think for 45 minutes (my Tivo skips commercials,) or if I'm ellipticaling while seeing who is voted off of the island or out of the house? My job feeds my intellect and my Freudian super-ego, but it also requires me to critically think and make some tough decisions - day in and day out. At this stage of my evolution, when I'm not working I want to turn it off and not have to think for a while. So, Yes, watching a bunch of muscle-heads argue over what exhaust to put on a custom motorcycle gives me a chance to "turn it off" for a moment.

Of course, so would some connection/conversation with the right woman. Come on, like me because when you are with me, you feel so inspired that it causes you to dream of doing something big, and because you feel safe, loved, and respected. Don't like me because I can Google "Impressive Books" and paste the top 20 here...

We good?
Six things I could never do without
... are a half dozen Blackout Donuts from the Doughnut Plant in the Chelse Hotel. And two mini bottles of Rumple Minze. Wait, that's 8 things. Can I count the donuts as one thing or is this being graded by Units of Measure? Cause if it is just considered One Thing, then I want to add Chicken to my list. Good Chicken, not some lame shake-n-bake-home-cooked version. Yes, good chicken cooked in Lard. With a pressure cooker, not just a regular frying pan. And of course donuts. As many as I can take with me. And Rumple Minze, cause it's making a come back. At least in my house, it is. Is someone going to check my pockets to make sure I didn't bring seven things? If not, I intend to take more.
Just sayin'.....
I spend a lot of time thinking about
..if I sound like a total loser or jerk in this profile...
I'm sure some of you are thinking that I'm not taking it seriously.
I assure you: you are correct.
In the long run, I doubt that you are going to like me more because of my answers to these questions.
You will like me because 1) what I look like somehow makes you feel safe and you can picture me reaching for your hand when we walk; 2) my sentence structure is acceptable to your standards; 3) my sense of humor resonates with you - in fact, makes you crave to know what's really under the facade; 4) you can see past what I'm doing here with this profile; and 5) you recognize that there is a much more elevated guy here than the one trying to impress you with the places he's been or the death-defying activities he's performed.
Maybe YOU should be the one thinking about it...
On a typical Friday night I am
... wondering if going out will make me look cool, cause what I really feel like doing is just spending the evening with someone that I care about, with whom I am willing to let down my walls and let her get to know the real me, and wind down and reconnect from the busy week we just had.
But watch out Saturday Night, cause I'm gonna bust-a-move like there was no tomorrow... or maybe we'll just keep winding down...and finish eating the Blackout Donuts...and reading impressive books to update this profile.
Cause that's how I roll...
And since you will get tired of me soon enough, I need to start working on my upgrade strategy.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
... is that I really do spend a lot of time thinking about if this profile will make me sound like a jerk. I bet you are sorry that you asked for a private thing, eh? Or maybe you wanted to know about the time that I accidentally wore brown socks with black shoes. I know, it's horrible, right? Maybe I shouldn't have admitted it...Rats, my backspace key doesn't work. Now what?
You should message me if
... when you look in the mirror, you can honestly say that you are not a stalker, psycho, nut-job, gold digger, or a big liar...come on, be honest...are you a bit of a nut-job? I know that you are hot and have mad chicken-pot-pie-making skills, but don't-cha think that maybe you should rethink messaging me since some of you "women" are really named Steve and live in your mom's basement and have a rather pronounced Adam's Apple?

But of course, you should message me if you get my attempt at humor here in my profile and recognize that I'm a bit more private than an online dating site allows for. I'm hoping that we get a chance to interact, then we'll both know if we should continue, or hit the road. Actually, we both don't have to hit the road. Just one of us, to make it official and all. Or we both could, for drama. On second thought, maybe you should just message me anyway and we'll figure it out together. By together, I mean you, me, and the New York Institution for the Criminally Insane. See, I told you I was going to out you, Steve...
The two of us