28 Moline, United States
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My self-summary
I'm everyone's favorite Starbucks barista. Most call me "the one with the beard". Trust me, your grandmother probably thinks I'm an absolute fucking delight when she's getting her nonfat hazelnut latte.
What I’m doing with my life
Crafting only the finest, overpriced, corporate coffee beverages. It pays the bills, and I work almost exclusively with the raddest people.
I’m really good at
Math and making spaghetti. These two skills rarely coincide.
The first things people usually notice about me
I look like Jesus. Well, according to every drunk person I've ever met, at least.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books- I admittedly don't read as much as I'd like to. But, The Lord of the Rings trilogy was rad, I really liked Fahrenheit 451, and a few other really obvious and expected answers.

Movies- I like a lot of different movies, mostly comedies. But, all I'll say specifically is that I've seen Jason X three times. Yes, that is the Friday the 13th movie that takes place in outer space and IT IS ART.

Shows- I don't watch a whole lot of TV, and anything I do watch is just what I set to record on my DVR. The regulars are The Daily Show with Trevor Noah, The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore, The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, @midnight, Bob's Burgers, Archer, Another Period, and The Venture Bros.

Music- I mostly go back and forth between electronic music, metal, and folksy indie music. I like Porter Robinson, deadmau5, CHVRCHES, Every Time I Die, Mastodon, Regina Spektor, etc.

Food- I could eat pasta or curry for literally every meal for the rest of my life and be perfectly content.
The six things I could never do without
Coffee - Necessary for living. Sorry, water.
Friends - Those guys are pretty neato.
Internet- Entertaining things live there.
Sleep- I'm super good at it
Art - I have the privilege of knowing way more fantastic painters, illustrators, musicians, and the like than seems statistically plausible.
Cigarettes - Hey, we all get at least one unhealthy vice, right?
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Space, audio compressors, and grilled cheese sandwiches.
On a typical Friday night I am
Probably closing at Starbucks. Send help.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I haven't worn underwear in at least two years. It's not a weird sex thing or anything. It was essentially just a dare from a friend, because she never wears underwear, and it got way out of hand.
You should message me if
You, uh, feel like it? I dunno, I'm not here to tell people what to do.