35Richardson, United States
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My self-summary
I'm kinda undateable right now. I'm just getting back on here to make friends and drinking buddies.

A few things:

I'm inexorably drawn to smiles, especially those that make me smile back. So much so, that I may stalk your profile just to look at your smile. On the other hand, I almost never send messages on this site. It's a numbers game, and I'm not playing. So if you notice me repeatedly viewing your profile, but not messaging, it's 'cause I dig your profile but have no intention of shouting along with the mob. If you catch me stalking and want to talk, say so. It's the 21st century, and women who make the first move are sexy.

We now return to your regularly scheduled profile...

I've been on this site forever and I've never taken it seriously.
I'm not about to start now.

More about me:
My whole life has been, for lack of a better word, weird.

My father is 3rd gen Lebanese from Boston. He served for 30+ years in the US military. He fully buys into shit like "The Secret" and the "Laws of Attraction," and constantly pushes it on me. If they had let him, his dog tags would have marked his religion as 'Jedi.'

My mother is an all-American Irish mutt from rural Oklahoma. She's a conservative fundamentalist Christian who's worked for the Salvation Army in one capacity or another since the dawn of time.

When I was 21, my father and I had this conversation:
Me: Dad, was I adopted?
Dad: No. Why do you ask?
Me: 'Cause I've been thinking about it, and I can't figure out how you and my mother got along well enough to fuck.
Dad: (after laughing hysterically for several minutes) Yeah. Me, neither.
*True Story.

When these two intelligent, if absurd, humans divorced, they decided to share custody of me by trading me off each school year. Long story short: I not only relocated every August until I was 14, but utterly shifted paradigms. The result is that I have never comfortably fit in anywhere regarding typical social identifications. Religion, for example, is an impossibly complicated subject and I could never accurately describe myself with any of the labels provided by OkCupid. Nor have I ever been able to fit into either side of the Northern/Southern dichotomy, nor Arab vs. Irish vs. American culture. Combine these contradictory influences with my own intensely introverted and contrary nature, and I think it's fair to say that you're just gonna have to get to know me.
What I’m doing with my life
Work: I teach. Which is absurd. You just have no idea.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I read a lot, so it's hard to pick favorites, but...
Maniac Magee, by Jerry Spinelli
Friday, by Robert A. Heinlein
Heavy Metal Islam, by Mark Levine
The Book Thief, by Markus Zusak

I enjoy a lot of Sci-Fi, like Star Wars novels, the Dune series, etc.; and select Fantasy stuff like the Song of Ice and Fire and Temeraire series.

I also try to keep up with young adult fiction, so I can encourage my students (and anyone else, honestly) to be active readers.

Ugly Americans
The Daily Show and The Colbert Report
Family Guy

Led Zeppelin
Fair to Midland

Taco Bell
Hot wings
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Everything. I'm seriously lost in my own head most of the time.
At any given moment, I'm thinking about religion, faith, history, politics, literature, music, relationships, and midgets. Yes, all at the same time.
On a typical Friday night I am
drinking Manischewitz, going out to terrorize goyim.
Stomping shagitz, screwing shiksas,
as long as we're home by Saturday morning.

(I cannot read that prompt without this popping into my head. Message me if you actually get the reference.)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I believe happiness is found in the giant chunky chocolate chip cookie you split with the person you just had sex with. Even if that person is yourself.
You should message me if
You want to talk to me.
Seriously. I'm not going to send the first message. Blame statistics.

Also this: http://markmanson.net/fuck-yes
The two of us