A lot of people here are unsure about this online dating process. I know that I cannot really tell from an online profile and questions/answers how the chemistry is between two people.
I don't believe in having a list of "must haves" for such things as online profiles does not work. We actually need to meet each other and date, to get to know each other for a bit. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stronger-the-broken-places/201610/what-really-matters-when-you-choose-partner?utm_source=FacebookPost&utm_medium=FBPost&utm_campaign=FBPost
I think this quote captures how the online dating process is backwards: "An online profile is like reading the ingredients on a box of food and trying to imagine what it would taste like." So take my ingredients with a grain of salt ;-).
Speaking of food metaphors...I take the spaghetti approach to dating, i.e. throw it on the wall and see if it sticks. Just try it out and see. I would love someone who appreciates me and I appreciate in turn. I am willing to try and am open to the possibilities (throwing on the wall) and if someone "sticks" then that's great.
I believe that we live from love or fear. I work on living consciously from love. I am not always consistent or mindful and I recognize that. I would love a mate that does too. I want us to find our common humanity and in turn, our heart. Come join me and take the risk. This Jim Carrey's video captures this nicely https://www.youtube.com/watch?annotation_id=annotation_2967509095&feature=iv&src_vid=uJD5-R_HPCc&v=t69L1kSkMrw
I view life and relationships the same, if there is a willingness to be in our hearts and to be connected then things can be worked out and life can be enjoyed.
I have been described as kind, grounded, open, honest, intelligent, empathetic, calm, centered, and positive. And I got references ;-).
I don't really have a "go to" thing to do. I enjoy being physically active, emotionally connected, and intellectually engaged so that can cover a variety of things. I am up for most anything for it is the company I share that is important to me more so than the activity.
I discovered an Oregon poet, Primus St. John from seeing his poem on a MAX train. I like what he wrote "Gullibility is the key to adventure." I tend to be gullible and I like adventure.
I absolutely love Portland. I am more of a city guy for I love going to what this city has to offer; music, food, pubs, Portlandia weird events (ex. Naked Bike Ride, Adult Soapbox Derby), Portland Summer Parks concerts and movies and the like. I also like museums, art galleries, funky shops, parks, bowling, street festivals, pubs, indie movies, going out to eat,...I tend for favor music I can move my feet and shake my bootie to.
I do like being active whether it is in the gym, outside running, or biking with a friend, or walking my sweet dog. I'm up for a hike in the Gorge or an urban hike with a Meetup group.
Basically I'm up to do most anything as long as i get to do it with people I can have fun with.
I love connecting people who are in touch with their joy and willing to be vulnerable. I look to contribute in making world a better place; it can be as small as reaching out to a friend or expressing gratitude to a service worker for their work. Mother Teresa said, “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”
I also very good at dancing wildly with abandon to R&B/soul/funk/African beat music. I embrace "Dance like nobody is watching." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ow6IaHmDNLI
I give a good massage.
Carol: You haven't met anyone?
Madge Hardcastle: Single by choice. Just not my choice
I read books on communication and pop neuroscience books "Thinking Fast and Slow" and "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking."
Music? I love Afro-pop and most any kind of percussion type bootie shaking music. R&B especially with a horn section like Soul Vaccination or 5 Guys Named Moe or Patrick Lamb, fusion jazz, and indie pop/rock. I think that the Waterfront Blues Festival is the best bargain bar none. There is no such thing as bad music anytime there.
Food? I am very unlike most people around here, i.e. I can eat gluten. I don't mind eating meat or dairy though I like to focus on eating no wheat or dairy or meat. I eat most anything. I hang with a lot of vegan friends and those who are gluten intolerant. Given a preference, I like spicy like Thai. Pizza I can eat every day especially wood fired pizza (of course that negates what I said about avoiding dairy or wheat) . So go to ethnic foods I love are Indian, Greek, Middle Eastern, Thai, and of course Japanese.
1. the Internet - I love connecting this way. This is an amazing technology where I get to communicate with people that I would have never would have "met" otherwise.
2. Optimism and faith - I would have never gotten this far in life without these two things. I have a hopeful belief in the Divine. ""Everything will be all right in the end... if it's not all right then it's not yet the end." which is from The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel movie.
3. Physical touch is my primary Love Language (see Gary Chapman's book, The 5 Love Languages). I just love giving and receiving hugs. I hug all my friends, male and female.
4. Being physically active and healthy. Being in touch with my body and feeling it is important as well as feeling strong (that's relative for it is more of a sense than actual muscles for me). I run and do gym workouts daily.
5. Laughing - especially with my kids for they just crack me up. They are true beings of Light. I also do the ironic laugh (laughing inside). One of my better friends brought Laughter Yoga to Portland.
6. My comfortable bed especially with flannel or fleece sheets, very comfy.
I just heard a podcast about what makes a great relationship. Accountability, vulnerability, empathy. I like that. Simple.
Having common interests and activities are an additional bonus but first and foremost these are needed, i.e. kindness and respect.
This is a nice reminder on why we are here, putting ourselves out online ...
Basically I am working on living a more conscious and meaningful life which means I'm thinking about this a lot. I believe that being this way will not only make me happier, more fulfilled but also attract the right woman in my life.
The only time I swear is when I am doing home repair projects and not very often at that.
I use flannel sheets all year even during the Summer.