tao-te
63 Beaverton, United States
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tao-te
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My self-summary
I am a Noo Joisey native (youse gotta a problem wit dat?), third generation Japanese American (grandparents were immigrants), and whose spiritual practice is kindness, being present, and having gratitude. I get excited about life and authentic connection with people with good hearts.

I don't sweat the small stuff. I don't have a checklist. If you are kind and if we have chemistry and you own your own sh*t then we can go from there. The rest are in the details. Life is too short to focus on what is wrong with the other rather than what is right for each of us.

A lot of people here are unsure about this online dating process. I know that I cannot really tell from an online profile and questions/answers how the chemistry is between two people.

I think this quote captures how the online dating process is backwards: "An online profile is like reading the ingredients on a box of food and trying to imagine what it would taste like." So take my ingredients with a grain of salt ;-).

Speaking of food metaphors...I take the spaghetti approach to dating, i.e. throw it on the wall and see if it sticks. Just try it out and see. I would love someone who appreciates me and I appreciate in turn. I am willing to try and am open to the possibilities (throwing on the wall) and if someone "sticks" then that's great.

I believe that we live from love or fear. I work on living consciously from love. I am not always consistent or mindful and I recognize that. I would love a mate that does too. I want us to find our common humanity and in turn, our heart. Come join me and take the risk. This Jim Carrey's video captures this nicely https://www.youtube.com/watch?annotation_id=annotation_2967509095&feature=iv&src_vid=uJD5-R_HPCc&v=t69L1kSkMrw

I view life and relationships the same, if there is a willingness to be in our hearts and to be connected then things can be worked out and life can be enjoyed.

I have been described as kind, grounded, open, honest, intelligent, empathetic, calm, centered, and positive. And I got references ;-).

I don't really have a "go to" thing to do. I enjoy being physically active, emotionally connected, and intellectually engaged so that can cover a variety of things. I am up for most anything for it is the company I share that is important to me more so than the activity.

I discovered an Oregon poet, Primus St. John from seeing his poem on a MAX train. I like what he wrote "Gullibility is the key to adventure." I tend to be gullible and I like adventure.
What I’m doing with my life
I see that my life's purpose is to help others recognize and get in touch with their inner wisdom so that they can shift their lives into a healthier and happier space. I do that with by drawing on all my experience and skills which include being a compassionate listener,having a mindful presence, along with an amalgam of other modalities that I have learned along the way.

I absolutely love Portland. I am more of a city guy for I love going to what this city has to offer; music, food, pubs, Portlandia weird events (ex. Naked Bike Ride, Adult Soapbox Derby), Portland Summer Parks concerts and movies and the like. I also like museums, art galleries, funky shops, parks, bowling, street festivals, pubs, indie movies, going out to eat,...I tend for favor music I can move my feet and shake my bootie to.

I do like being active whether it is in the gym, outside running, or biking with a friend, or walking my sweet dog. I'm up for a hike in the Gorge or an urban hike with a Meetup group.

Basically I'm up to do most anything as long as i get to do it with people I can have fun with.

I love connecting people who are in touch with their joy and willing to be vulnerable. I look to contribute in making world a better place; it can be as small as reaching out to a friend or expressing gratitude to a service worker for their work. Mother Teresa said, “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”
I’m really good at
Listening. I really am curious about people. I find it is my gift to be present with those I am with. I am a conscious listener.

I also very good at dancing wildly with abandon to R&B/soul/funk/African beat music. I embrace "Dance like nobody is watching." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ow6IaHmDNLI

I give a good massage.
The first things people usually notice about me
That I am intelligent, a good listener and have a calmness about me. Physically I've been told I got great shoulders and a nice tush.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I got to see The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. It was a very sweet movie. I thought this was a relevant movie quote for us here on OKC:
Carol: You haven't met anyone?
Madge Hardcastle: Single by choice. Just not my choice

I read books on communication and pop neuroscience books "Thinking Fast and Slow" and "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking."

Anne Lamott's "Small Victories: Spotting Improbable Moments of Grace" She's a hoot. I got to see her three times when she has come to town.

Music? I love Afro-pop and most any kind of percussion type bootie shaking music. R&B especially with a horn section like Soul Vaccination or 5 Guys Named Moe or Patrick Lamb, fusion jazz, and indie pop/rock. I think that the Waterfront Blues Festival is the best bargain bar none. There is no such thing as bad music anytime there.

Food? I am very unlike most people around here, i.e. I can eat gluten. I don't mind eating meat or dairy though I like to focus on eating no wheat or dairy or meat. I eat most anything. I hang with a lot of vegan friends and those who are gluten intolerant. Given a preference, I like spicy. Pizza I can eat every day especially wood fired pizza (of course that negates what I said about avoiding dairy or wheat) . So go to ethnic foods I love are Indian, Greek, Middle Eastern, Thai, and of course Japanese.
The six things I could never do without
beyond the usual conventional things like love, family-friends, health, ...
1. the Internet - I love connecting this way. This is an amazing technology where I get to communicate with people that I would have never would have "met" otherwise.
2. Optimism and faith - I would have never gotten this far in life without these two things. I have a hopeful belief in the Divine. ""Everything will be all right in the end... if it's not all right then it's not yet the end." which is from The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel movie.
3. Physical touch is my primary Love Language (see Gary Chapman's book, The 5 Love Languages). I just love giving and receiving hugs. I hug all my friends, male and female.
4. Being physically active and healthy. Being in touch with my body and feeling it is important as well as feeling strong (that's relative for it is more of a sense than actual muscles for me). I run and do gym workouts daily.
5. Laughing - especially with my kids for they just crack me up. They are true beings of Light. I also do the ironic laugh (laughing inside). One of my better friends brought Laughter Yoga to Portland.
6. My comfortable bed especially with flannel or fleece sheets, very comfy.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I wonder what kind of dedication and effort it takes to co-create a long lasting relationship. I think a lot about being in a committed, loving relationship that has mutual respect and grace.

I just heard a podcast about what makes a great relationship. Accountability, vulnerability, empathy. I like that. Simple.

Having common interests and activities are an additional bonus but first and foremost these are needed, i.e. kindness and respect.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/love-proof/201412/the-two-qualities-everyone-needs-in-partner

This is a nice reminder on why we are here, putting ourselves out online ...
http://thoughtcatalog.com/heidi-priebe/2016/01/the-kind-of-person-all-of-us-are-waiting-for/

Basically I am working on living a more conscious and meaningful life which means I'm thinking about this a lot. I believe that being this way will not only make me happier, more fulfilled but also attract the right woman in my life.
On a typical Friday night I am
Usually I look to get out to do a MeetUp or be with a friend. Otherwise I just do a hard workout and recover at home watching Netflix. Ideally I would be in relationship and share that time with you.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I cry at chick flicks. I cry when I talk about my kids.
The only time I swear is when I am doing home repair projects and not very often at that.
I use flannel sheets all year even during the Summer.
You should message me if
anything I say resonates with you. Who knows? Maybe we can actually meet, connect and have some chemistry! Wow, what a concept *grin*!
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