New Jersey native with roots in the Deep South and heart in the Upper Midwest. No Scarlett O'Hara or "Fargo" accent, but I love barbecue, magnolia trees, snow, lakes, bratwurst, and public radio.
Almost my entire adult life has been spent in the Upper Midwest--first Chicago (for undergrad), then Minneapolis (for law school), and it's definitely a part of the country with a special place in my heart. I still miss Minneapolis like crazy, especially its comfortable summers, snowy (not soggy) winters, amazing local music and theater scenes, and open-minded, friendly, unpretentious, fun-loving, progressive people.
I love to travel, even just a short trip to get me out of the NYC area for a few days. I'm totally open to meeting people beyond the metro area, and if you're in Philadelphia, Northampton, New Haven, Providence, Boston, Baltimore, Albany, DC, or anywhere a BoltBus or Amtrak ride away, I'd love to hear from you!
A big thank you to OKC for adding more gender and orientation options! Of the ones available "queer" works the best for me, but I tend to call myself "unlabeled." I've found myself mostly attracted to women, transmen, nonbinary, agender, genderfluid, and genderqueer folks, but I generally see attraction as evolving or fluctuating. I present on the masculine side of things, but I'm all for the abolition of the gender binary. I practice ethical non-monogamy (some people prefer the term polyamory), as do many of my friends.
Pronouns: he/him or they/them
ENTP, GGG (although I find Dan Savage's biphobia/transphobia problematic).
I'm nonreligious, although I was raised Jewish and still consider myself culturally Jewish.
Politically, I lean pretty far to the left. I consider myself an antiracist feminist who would be a member of a socialist/anticapitalist political party if we had a viable one here. I use words like "cissexist", "ableist," and "kyriarchy" in everyday conversation. I love a good argument, but I'm not interested in dating libertarians, Republicans, or any other kind of right-winger; our basic values would just be too fundamentally different for an intimate relationship to work.
I rather enjoy smoking weed; I don't mind if you don't, but it would be thoroughly awesome if you did.
Because I miss the little "three words" thing at the top of my profile: I am open-minded, inquisitive, and surreal
Oh, and I kinda look like Seth Rogen. At least that's what a lot of people have told me.
Books: anything by Bill Bryson or John Hodgman, A Confederacy of Dunces, Brave New World, A People's History of the United States, The Disaster Artist. I'm getting ready to start on some feminist/anticapitalist speculative fiction: Ursula K. Le Guin, Octavia Butler, Iain M. Banks.
Movies: Monty Python and the Holy Grail, The Big Lebowski, History of the World Part 1 (or pretty much anything Mel Brooks), Koyaanisqatsi, THE ROOM. That last one is super-important; I met Tommy Wiseau and Greg Sestero when they came to Minneapolis in 2009, and I've never missed their annual appearances in NYC since moving back here.
Music: M.I.A., Santigold, Courtney Barnett, Spoon, Hot Chip, Grizzly Bear, LCD Soundsystem (YAY LIVE SHOWS AND NEW ALBUM THIS YEAR), Joy Division, Kendrick Lamar, Oneohtrix Point Never, Passion Pit, Lykke Li, The Hold Steady, Vampire Weekend, Girl Talk, Sleigh Bells, Animal Collective, Washed Out, Toro y Moi, Wild Flag, Sleater-Kinney, Dan Deacon, The Weeknd, Atmosphere, Lizzo, Titus Andronicus, Purity Ring, Bloc Party, Boards of Canada. Living in Minnesota has also given me a deep and abiding appreciation for Prince (RIP), to the point where I loudly sing along to "Let's Go Crazy" or "Purple Rain" every time I hear those songs on the radio. After spending an awesome evening discovering Boards of Canada, I've been trying to find more music that has the trippy, analogue-synth type of sound associated with public information films and children's television shows from the late 60s to early 80s. So far, I've loved Advisory Circle and The Focus Group, but I need more suggestions.
"All My Friends" and "Dance Yrself Clean" by LCD Soundsystem are my two "STOP EVERYTHING AND SHUT UP AND JUST LISTEN AND APPRECIATE HOW AWESOME THIS IS" songs.
I recently got bit by the shape-note singing bug. I get together with a bunch of folks to sing somewhere in the city at least once a week, and it's always a good time. It's an early American folk music tradition that is completely participatory (no audiences), easy to pick up (but there's always more to learn), and delightfully nerdy. If you're not familiar with it (or if you are!), you should totally join me for a singing sometime.
Food: I'm an adventurous eater (might have to draw the line at surströmming or casu marzu, though!), with tastes that lean towards umami, salty, and savory rather than sweet. If I had to narrow my favorites down, I'd say I like anything Vietnamese or Chinese, Chicago-style hot dogs, moules frites, Neapolitan pizza, Hawaiian plate lunch, quality burgers, chicken-fried steak, kimchi, kalbi, shoyu ramen, Waffle House (living in WH territory totally didn't diminish my love for it), Memphis and KC barbecue, and fresh berries.
Drink: Single-malts, Oregon pinot noir, German lagers, Belgian ales, or pretty much whatever's on special at the bar (unless it's Jäger or Southern Comfort. Yuck.) Also, if any homesick Minnesotans want to help me smuggle cases of Grain Belt Premium back to the east coast, contact me immediately.
Shows: My all-time favorites are Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!, Tom Goes to the Mayor, classic Simpsons, Bob's Burgers, Futurama, Look Around You, Peep Show, and That Mitchell and Webb Look. I was a bit late to the party on Broad City, Parks & Rec, and Workaholics, but I love all of them. Sometimes I'll get stoned and watch Regular Show, Rick and Morty, or King of the Hill after work and that's pretty much my happy place. My semi-guilty pleasures are The Price is Right, Dragons' Den (UK)/Shark Tank (US) (and their Canadian and Australian spinoffs, fun for exploring subtle cultural differences between similar places) and a few reality shows too cringe-y to even mention here (but not The Bachelor or any of its derivatives!). I don't usually have the attention span for hour-long dramas, but Breaking Bad blew my mind and I absolutely adore Mad Men. GoT is necessary viewing too.
Podcasts: 99% Invisible, Welcome to Night Vale, Chapo Trap House, The F Plus, How Did This Get Made?
#7 (it's just as arbitrary as 6, isn't it?): a willingness to critique, discuss, and debate. If you're the kind of person who doesn't value discourse, we probably won't have very much fun.
National, state, and local politics. I listen to NPR, even though I'm staunchly to the left of it, and keep up with a bunch of blogs and news sites (Media Matters, AlterNet, Democracy Now! and longform.org, just to name a few) almost every morning. I think a lot about racism, gender essentialism, classism, the carceral state, corporate control of government, and income inequality. How can we rise up and change all of this in an effective way? I lend my time and energy to the #blacklivesmatter movement when I can, and I've fallen pretty hard for Bernie Sanders.
The various quirks of places and other fascinating cultural phenomena. What baseball team do people in Nashville actually root for? How do all the hipsters I see in San Francisco and Brooklyn seem to know each other, afford a lifestyle of near-constant going out, and coordinate their clothes so ridiculously well? Why do Queens addresses need a hyphen in the middle? Why do Brooklynites consider only Manhattan to be "the city," even though Brooklyn is part of the same city? Why is it that the Italian beef sandwich hasn't caught on outside Chicago? How did the Twin Cities get to be such a hotbed of geek culture?
All sorts of (useless?) trivia. Among the things rattling around in my brain: area codes, Olympic cities, #1 pop songs, city populations, World Series winners, interstate highway termini. You definitely want me on your team for bar trivia, but you don't want to play me in Trivial Pursuit. I also enjoy playing Scrabble, but I'm only so-so at it.
When I lived in Minneapolis, my favorite place to be on a Friday night was drinking beers and gossiping in the front yard with my friends Jami and Heather for one of our infamous yard parties.
Also, I am absolutely fascinated by huge collections of data or information. I can sit and read a street atlas or book of trivia for hours. Sometimes I'll look up the Wikipedia entry for the food I'm eating during a meal. When I was a kid, I'd read the Yellow Pages or White Pages for fun.
You're curious about shapenote singing, or you're a shapenote singer yourself and want to connect with another familiar face at a singing.
You are Ilana Glazer and/or Abbi Jacobson.
You're cool with people who are poly/non-monogamous/who don't adhere to the mainstream conception of what intimate relationships ought to look like.
Bonus points if you consider yourself a "maker." If you can do shit with your hands or your body, I am in awe. I don't care if it's cooking, woodworking, knitting, robotics, playing a musical instrument, DJing, jewelry design, dancing, martial arts, circus shit, homebrewing, or whatever, I want to share in the amazing things you know how to do.
A word of caution: I generally won't respond to unsolicited IMs from cisgender men with a match percentage of less than 90%. There are plenty of other people out there on this site for you; I'm just not interested.
Femme-y gaymer/geek boys with match percentages over 90% who love to cuddle? I'd love to hear from you.
DON'T message me if you have ever seriously used the phrases "I'm not racist/sexist/homophobic/etc. but..." or "#AllLivesMatter." You should also stay away if you have ever unironically described yourself as having a "personal brand." Ugggghhhhh.
No cops. No narcs. NO TRUMP SUPPORTERS. EVER EVER EVER.