32Pineville, United States
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My self-summary
I have a crazy/awesome/genius 8 year old daughter. I teach high school English (English IV and English III AP), so bonus points if you're LIEK GUD AT WORDS N STUFFS. As of august 2014, I'm in a relationship with a ridiculous, beautiful, dapper girl. 😍😍😍 (and as of October 2015, I'm married to her!)

I am a smartass with a very dry sense of humor. I am not a thin person and you can fuck right off if that matters to you. PLEASE message me telling me I'm a rude bitch. You will become the laughing stock of the internet. Truth. Same goes for messages asking me for pictures.

Aside from my daughter and teaching, roller derby is probably one of the most important things in my life. I play for Alexandria's team, the Cenla Derby Dames, and I sub for numerous teams around the state. I have a 10-game-streak coming up but I love every second of what I do and if this theoretical you + me thing is going to work out, you have to support it. Period. The end. I am ridiculously laid back (to my own peril sometimes) so the fact that this is a non-negotiable is kinda' huge.
What I’m doing with my life
Going back to school to get my MA in English, playing derby all over Louisiana, Texas, and Mississippi, and spending time with my awesome kid. I'm a huge book nerd, I love to cook (especially healthy food), and as of recently, I love working out.
I’m really good at
"your mom" would be inappropriate here, wouldn't it? Yeah... thought so. People tend to think I'm kind of funny, so I guess I'm really good at.... wit. I'm pretty good at knocking skaters on their asses, too, so there's that.

I play the guitar and own five (although that doesn't mean I'm good at playing.) People think I sing decently. If you're interested, go here:
The first things people usually notice about me
Definitely my smile and my sense of humor. I'm a silly bitch, what can I say?
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Oh geez, this is going to take a while.


This section was crazy-long when I originally did it. I love Chuck Palahniuk, though. Always and forever. I also really liked the Game of Thrones series!

Anyway, favorite books:

The Road - Cormac McCarthy
Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
Revolutionary Road - Richard Yates
Choke – Chuck Palahniuk
House of Leaves – Mark Danielewski
Geek Love – Katherine Dunn
No One Belongs Here More Than You – Miranda July
Knockemstiff – Donald Ray Pollock
On the Road – Jack Kerouac
Farenheit 451 – Ray Bradbury
Raw Shark Texts – Steven Hall

I'm generally in the middle of three books, so if you're literate, holla!


Fight Club
Boondock Saints
Beasts of the Southern Wild
Natural Born Killers
The Usual Suspects
Smokin' Aces
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Again, the music list in particular was super long, so instead of a compilation of what I listen to (it's pretty long and diverse), here's what's on my playlist right now:


Dax Riggs

Fiona Apple

The Civil Wars

Black Rebel Motorcycle Club

Drive-by Truckers

Old 97's

The Black Keys

Citizen Cope

Susan Tedeschi

James Lee Hooker



Dropkick Murphys

Smashing Pumpkins
Six things I could never do without
1. My kiddo.... who is the best, smartest, most awesome...etc. etc.
3. Family/friends. Of course.
4. Music/art/creativity.
5. Existential conversation.
6. Your mom.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Everything. Feminism: why it matters and why none of it matters. Love: real or nature's way of tricking us into reproducing. Stereotypes: why we have them and where we'd be without them. Identity: are we what society has made us, or are we who we build ourselves to be.

Haha... That's pretty much day in and day out with me.
On a typical Friday night I am
... well there IS no typical Friday night. Sometimes I like to stay home, sometimes I like to go to hole-in-the-wall Irish bars, and other times I look for a little trouble to get into. ;)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm a total goofball. That's not really a secret, but be forewarned - I don't have a serious bone in my body. And I guess as much as I come off as a hard ass (which I so totally am!), I still want someone who will love and fight for me as much as I would them. That's one thing I've never found.
You should message me if
- you have a sense of humor
- you like thick girls
- you're not batshit crazy
- you're a guy with a badass beard
- you're a girl with short, choppy hair
- you have tattoos
The two of us