When I was a child, the oldest of 3 boys, I wanted to see and do everything. I wanted to know the richness of life and the spartan darkness as well. My travels in search of this have taken me far and wide. I've lived many lives already within this one. I've hitch hiked thousands of miles across Canada and into Alaska, I've sought fruition and prosperity in half a dozen careers, I've made 6 figures and I've lived on nothing but spare change and dumpster garnish. Where once, I might have been a shapely brick in an elders' concept of an organized collective; I am now perhaps less rigid and have had my edges worn smooth. These scars define me. I am uniquely abraded and no less youthful or exuberant about the possibilities before me. I'm the jagged stone in the silvery brook that stands out amongst the rounded river rocks. I find joy in abandon, yet I've learned through hardship not to be as reckless as I once was. I'm no less willing to be the first to jump. I search out the high peaks and the low valleys. The journey between them fills my soul with promise.
A close friend once told me, "A man is only allowed three great loves in his life". I challenge this like a handicap. I mean, how can you move forward on your path if you're constantly looking over your shoulder? I'm here only to meet traveling companions along this never ending adventure, and if possible (probably while looking over my shoulder) fall right into another great love as if it were a horse turd in the path. You may be asking yourself at this point why in the world I would introduce poop humor into a romantic metaphor. Let's entertain that thought with a reference, shall we?
"I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it."
~George Bernard Shaw
With this in mind...what's the harm in getting a little dirty? Seriously? It's not like I'm over here taking myself so seriously that I'd invest any trappings in OkCupid's great socialistic matching algorithm to think I might actually meet someone worth considering a 'life partner'! Puuulleasse! I'm just here to meet like minded souls to share the ride (or at least a laugh) with. I lead a very full and adventurous life. I can be quite a handful. I'm attracted to boldly adventurous characters and have little time for the overly analytical. I'm inclined to defy judgement and play devil's advocate just for shits-n-giggles. I balance the world on my shoulders like Atlas and rarely shrug. More often I'm smiling, or laughing hysterically, at the lunacy of it all. As a broad generalization, I have a healthy relationship with sarcasm as an adeptly honed coping mechanism.
Here, before I absolutely blast you out with good quotes from Mark Twain and Will Rogers, I'd like to illustrate my love philosophy (devoid of poop humor, for the record) and my sarcasm savvy with a similar quote from an arguably more notable source:
"Nothing vast enters the lives of mortals without a curse"
How about I shut up now and let some other more adept souls speak for me:
" If I must be wrung through the paradox - broken into wholeness, wring me around the moon; pelt me with particles from the dark side. Fling me into space; hide me in a black hole. Let me dance with devils on dead stars. Let my scars leave brilliant traces, for my highborn soul seeks its hell - in high places."
~Aveh Pevlor Johnson
May Day ~Phillis Levin
I've decided to waste my life again,
Like I used to: get drunk on
The light in the leaves, find a wall
Against which something can happen,
Whatever may have happened
Long ago—let a bullet hole echoing
The will of an executioner, a crevice
In which a love note was hidden,
Be a cell where a struggling tendril
Utters a few spare syllables at dawn.
I've decided to waste my life
In a new way, to forget whoever
Touched a hair on my head, because
It doesn't matter what came to pass,
Only that it passed, because we repeat
Ourselves, we repeat ourselves.
I've decided to walk a long way
Out of the way, to allow something
Dreaded to waken for no good reason,
Let it go without saying,
Let it go as it will to the place
It will go without saying: a wall
Against which a body was pressed
For no good reason, other than this."
"I would rather be ashes than dust! I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than it should be stifled by dry-rot. I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. I shall use my time."
"Ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything, That's how the light gets in. "
An upsidedown in the earth a dead man walks upon my soles when I walk. ~Bill Knott
Making the best trip out of my one time around.
Dreaming of sailing.
living life on the edge.
Raising my minions responsibly.
Ask me about "crow therapy".
idiopathy: Idiopathic is an adjective used primarily in medicine meaning "a disease or condition the cause of which is not known or that arises spontaneously"
As in, there's something wrong with you, but in my professional diagnosis is that the disease is unknown.
"Funny, I just re read your profile. My first read through, you struck me as a classic asshole. But now after chatting a bit I read it as fairly hilarious."
the term 'trouble' rings a bell
My kids tell me I'm a B.A.M.F.
my bold character derived from stubborn patience
I'm loud, pretty, and I walk funny
Anything worth doing is worth overdoing
'The thing that makes you exceptional, if you are at all, is
inevitably that which must also make you lonely.'
~Lorraine Hansberry, playwright and painter (1930-1965)
Quod me nutrit me destruit
(b)"Oh Brother Where Art Thou", "Running Scared", "Reservoir Dogs", "The Departed", anything by the Coen Brothers, etc. Honestly, I'm horrible at remembering the names of movies or books...but I never forget a plot.
(c)Dammit..."shows", what the fuck is that extra category slipping into my OkSupid for? I mean, really...like, Broadway Shows?...The last "show" I went to was...crap...an opera or something ridiculous...wait...wait...It was actually some sort of political review at CU where Jello Biafra was on the reviewing board. Does that count? I took all my kids to see Demetri Martin there as well. As far as 'shows', I watch a lot of live music. I prefer the dive bar with instrumental talent over a DJ or a stadium performer any day. Oh, and I LOVE to dance...what's with all these people that won't dance with someone and just want to bobble heads in space? Red Rocks can be uncomfortably large depending on the performers. I commune to Jazz Fest in New Orleans like a religious pilgrimage...every year...to hold church! and THEN after church, I go to the Maple Leaf, crammed in a dark and dirty brothel sweating with my brethren and sisters until the sun comes up! Can I get an witness to testify?
(d)Recently, Bad Religion, Scream, The Black Keys, The New Mastersounds, Psychedelic Elephant, Go Gol Bordello, Bob Schneider, Buckethead, Jonny Sketch and the Dirty Notes, Dropkick Murphys...I saw an all female Public Enemy cover band a few months back that blew me away. My favorite local band is In The Whale. They rock my face off.
Before that: Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds, Taj Mahal, Toots and the Maytalls, Frank Black, Desmond Decker, Gomez, Travis Hill, the Whiskeyhounds.
Before that, Garage au Trois, Royal Fingerbowl, Del McCourey, Feist, Gillian Welch, ancient old Rolling Stones, Africando, Traffic, Clutch, Jack Johnson, Manu Chau..you named it, I'll give it a listen.
(e)I'll eat anything that doesn't eat me first...I absolutely LOVE to eat and cook. Food is the best drug/vice/part of life there is...I relish over cooking meals from fresh ingredients pilfered from grazing trips through more than one market whilst I babble barely coherent stories of debauchery and gesticulate madly as I stand over you while you eat. If I'm to die and go to hell for being a glutton, at least my fast metabolism will serve me with a young and well nourished corpse!
Prior to that, it was:
I only count three: air, water, food
"Fixed fortifications are testament to the stupidity of
close seconds...my kids, good company, a razor sharp French knife
If I had to sum all these up into one single thing that makes living worth living it's http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schadenfreude
While I'm on the subject, this is just too good not to share:
THIS JUST IN:
If I didn't have people to laugh at...well...Someone I love told me that life was "just orgasms and laughter"...but I think there might be more. I really like pouring thunderstorms, the sound of waves crashing onto land, and the smell of a freshly fallen snow complete with the crunch underfoot and deep silence in the distance.
Trying to conceal the heart on my sleeve. Or at least protect the right to bare it with a concealed weapon permit.
More often than my visits here...when I am not overwhelmed with just opening myself to FEEL (I'm not big on contemplation and survey, or living a life of constant evaluation and valuation...I'm much more "go-do-be")...I have been daydreaming of a 60 foot wooden hulled sloop built in the early 1900's...sailing it over clear cold waters somewhere far from here. Spain and Italy are high on the list. Leave a comment, or email me suggestions for the name of the boat. I think I'll call it gravy.
" For those who believe in God, most of the big questions are answered. But for those of us who can't readily accept the God formula, the big answers don't remain stone-written. We adjust to new conditions and discoveries. We are pliable. Love need not be a command nor faith a dictum. I am my own god. We are here to unlearn the teachings of the church, state, and our educational system. We are here to drink beer. We are here to kill war. We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us."
Tipping cows in fields Elysian
Trying to stay grounded...I tend to levitate for spectacle like David Blaine.
"Friday is a good day for sitting at the corner of the bar and thinking about what you've done"
I want to rip off your logic and make passionate sense to you
Yesterday, I ate Chinese and my fortune cookie said, "Working out the kinks today will make for a better tomorrow". My mind immediately dove to the gutter as I added 'in bed' to the end.
Never argue with an idiot, they'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.
You are not judgmental and live freely and exposed as a matter of choice. You would like to test drive my bullshit-vulnerability-deflector or compare drama-free-zones. If you think you can provide inspiration for living a righteous life without feeling like you stuck your neck into a social guillotine. If you are so inclined to poke sleeping lions, get nekkid in public, dance with a stranger, kiss with your eyes open, take a ride on my whimcycle, or just have a look at yourself in the reflection of my eyes. Please...go right ahead.
Else, you have some time to kill. You like my lack of tact and the recklessness of my abandoned punctuation , the utter sarcasm and disparity of my bent. Or maybe, if you just think you're infallible and need someone to stick and anchor in your pants....I'm like the anti-Emerill..."BAM"! (knock you back a notch)
Bonus points if you read all the way through my profile. Seriously, you either deserve a reward or deserve to be institutionalized. How bout I treat you by buying the first round in a local dive? I do fancy a challenge when it comes to the company I keep. Bring your big girl panties. Perhaps this speaks to why I get a kick out of talking to people that fall into the "Y'all have issues" column in the match section of this site.