My sincerity in this endeavor is quite earnest, I swear; however, I have found online dating to be rather ridiculous. As such, I've decided to update my profile to reflect the preposterousness of the situation. Some truths will be mixed in with the silliness and exaggerations, and I'll denote those with bold text and a ☼ when appropriate, but don't take anything too seriously. Do feel free to giggle (or more), though.
...running a fantasy garden gnome league
...hugging strangers in elevators who look like they need it
...training pterodactyls to swim
☼...providing tech support for my family☼...so much fun
...beating wizards at Sorry (not sorry)
☼...Finding things ☼
...making frenemies with bobcat amputees
☼...ummm...you know 😉 ☼
Movies: anything that random appearances by moose
Shows: ☼ interesting/entertaining ones ☼ about florescent muskrats
☼ Music: jams ☼
☼ Food: mostly just the kind I like (I'm kinda picky) ☼
☼ 2. Stage time ☼
☼ (...if I may be a bit superficial, though comedy is important to me.) ☼
3. Paquyderm political campaigns
4. Mummies who take pity on zombies
5. Dark matter
6. Fan mail from adoring mollusks
...if monkeys get confused by the term "monkey bars."
...if spiders would be less menacing if they had nipples.
...what my cat's voice would sound like if she spoke English with a British accent.
...baking cookies to sell so I can raise money to afford to buy Girl Scout Cookies.
So give a good guy (me! me! me!) a chance. Don't let the idiots ruin it for decent folks like me. ☺
...you want to go breaking cartoon characters out of prison...or maybe just make out or something.
☼...you know, you just think it'd be nice to start a conversation and see where it leads and such. You don't have to wait on me, bust a move. ☼
☼...You like pistachio ice cream. ☼
☼...I messaged you first, even if only to say, "Nope." ☼