My sincerity in this endeavor is quite earnest, I swear; however, I have found online dating to be rather ridiculous. As such, I've decided to update my profile to reflect the preposterousness of the situation. Some truths will be mixed in with the silliness and exaggerations, and I'll denote those with bold text and a ☼ when appropriate, but don't take anything too seriously. Do feel free to giggle (or more), though.
...running a fantasy garden gnome league
...hugging strangers in elevators who look like they need it
...prospecting for gold bouillon cubes
...beating wizards at Connect 4
☼Tic-Tac-Toe (I never lose) ☼
...making friends with bobcat amputees
☼...ummm...you know 😉 ☼
Movies: anything that includes someone cutting tomatoes
Shows: ☼ interesting/entertaining ones ☼ about muskrats
☼ Music: jams ☼
☼ Food: mostly the kind I like (I'm kinda picky) ☼
☼ 2. Stage time ☼
☼ (...if I may be a bit superficial, though comedy is important to me.) ☼
3. Bovine Harry Potter costume contests
4. The letter "q"
5. Dark matter
6. Fan mail from adoring mollusks
...how much more monkeying around monkeys would do if they had 2 tails.
...if spiders would be less menacing if they had belly buttons.
...what Genghis Khan's opinion of the theory of special relativity would be.
...baking cookies to sell so I can raise money to afford to buy Girl Scout Cookies.
...you want to go an adventure searching for magical wallabies to frolic with under a crescent moon...or maybe just make out or something.
☼...you know, you just think it'd be nice to start a conversation and see where it leads and such. You don't have to wait on me, bust a move.☼
...You like pizza and don't want to eat a whole one by yourself.
☼...I messaged you first, even if only to say, "Nope."☼