Pretention makes me wanna gag.
You'll definitely make me laugh if you openly fart in front of me. Or just let it go, wait the appropriate five seconds, and give me The Look.
Androgyny/bois/masculine of center ladies make me swoon.
Love is gonna save us.
This life is so small.
Becoming increasingly educated in the Ayurvedic tradition and yoga--through self-study obviously. Because money.
Learning how to refine my vegan skills. Like making butter. What? Oh, and fermenting all the things. Kombucha is next on my list.
I have a deep love and compassion for old people...I believe elder care and hospice is in my near future. But for now, I'll sell you kick-ass vape mods. And maybe build your next coil.
And I'll find any excuse to be on my bike. And by bike, I mean bicycle. Let's ride, friends.
making everyone feel at home,
helping old ladies cross the street (I have various badges),
making my own laundry soap,
being brutally honest yet empathetic,
finding gems in the alley/dumpster/ditch,
throwing together a dinner party from an empty pantry,
And that Molly Shannon could be my sister.
And if you ever fantasize about living a dreamy threesome kinda life with the sisters of CocoRosie, we'll probably make out. I also really dig The Antlers, Radiohead, Arcade Fire, M83, Sharon van Etten, Sleater-Kinney, Modest Mouse, Girl in a Coma, and Amanda Fucking Palmer.
Portlandia, all the way. I'll watch Guy Fieri just to make fun of him. I have a standing date with my man on Sundays for The Walking Dead.
Cookbooks and vegan food blogs are my porn. I also love queer erotica, anything based in Buddhism, and anything by Chris Hedges (look him up).
-Hot sauce. Preferably the aforementioned Sriracha, but in a bind, I'll take habaneros. I guess.
-A sturdy pair of black underwear.
-Alone time with good coffee. Seriously.
-Mental engagement. If I'm not learning something, I feel a little dead inside.
How to make others feel valued,
How to contribute to my immediate community,
What you must taste like,
Who's the best local band?,
you have lots of tattoos,
you read real books and can teach me a thing or two,
you lack the need to be constantly entertained,
you're not afraid of genderbending and queers (and can tie my tie for me),
you're willing to buy the first round (second's on me, ha),
and/or you know of how to show a Midwestern girl a good time in Texas.