DougOrleans
46Somerville, United States
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DougOrleans
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My self-summary
I'm just this guy, you know? Generally easy-going and laid back. Somewhat introverted, but I have a large social network and I am often the last to leave a party. I enjoy geocaching, disc golf, and maize mazes. I love to learn new things, when I have the time.

The personality type I most identify with is INTP ("The Thinker" or "The Architect"), but every time I take a personality test I get a different answer (as you can see on my tests page here). I am always a strong T (more analytical than emotional), but apparently I'm near the middle on the other three axes. Or maybe they're just not very good tests!

I enjoy looking at match percentages and seeing how people answer the questions, but I try not to take them too seriously. I'm open-minded, and while it is important to have things in common, I don't think a relationship needs to be about maximizing similarity. Mainly I'm looking for mutual attraction and compatible personalities. The rest will follow, right?
What I’m doing with my life
Temporarily retired. Relaxing and enjoying life! If you can afford to do this once or twice in your life (while you're young) I highly recommend it. I plan to return to my career as a web developer sometime in 2017.
I’m really good at
Procrastination. Also, Scrabble.
The first things people usually notice about me
I had to ask a friend. She said, "tall and hunky and dimple :)". I am doubtful about the hunky, but I'll buy the other two. I've been told by others that I am better-looking than my pictures. Want to take some better pictures of me?

Also, several people have told me I seem a lot younger than my age. I certainly feel a lot younger!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I used to think these lists made good conversation starters, but that hasn't really happened so I'm cutting this section down to size. I like a pretty wide variety of stuff; I tend to gravitate toward independent/alternative/experimental art and culture, but I like to stay in touch with the mainstream too. I like sci-fi and fantasy, art films and quirky rom-coms, punk rock and psychedelic/drone/noise music. I'm not hard to find on Goodreads or Last.fm if you want to know more details.

Foodwise, I am omnivorous. I like trying out new restaurants, but honestly I find it hard to beat a carnitas black-bean super-burrito from Anna's.
Six things I could never do without
Smartphone, precipitation, conversation, my glasses, air conditioning, pillows.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Politics, philosophy, relationships, technology, games, puzzles, music, the future, and the past. I should probably spend more time thinking about the present, but it goes by so fast!
On a typical Friday night I am
Every night is Friday night when you're retired! Board game night at a friend's house, live music at a small club, the occasional reading or talk. I prefer to see movies at weekday matinees when I can have most of the theater to myself...
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
What the "Relationship Type: Non-monogamous" setting means to me:
1. I don't require monogamy. I don't want to prevent a partner from doing the things that make her happy and fulfilled, even if that includes seeing other people.
2. I can see myself being happily monogamous with the right person, but for now I find it less stressful and more enriching to have multiple relationships, and to have the freedom to say yes to new relationships.
3. The mode that makes the most sense to me right now is being "solo poly". My "primary", as in the person I want to spend most of my time with, is myself: I have too many perennially back-burnered projects that I would like to be spending more time working on, and as I head into middle age I am realizing that I won't be able to put them off forever. Meanwhile, it would be nice to have a few people to occasionally hang out with and be intimate with, and it seems more likely for that to work out if the people I date are themselves in other relationships (or perhaps "solo poly" themselves).

That last part means it's an interesting question whether my Status is "Single" or "In an open relationship". At any given moment I may be in one or more open relationships, but since none of them are "primary", it still sort of feels like I'm single? But if you're specifically looking for someone who is both non-monogamous and in zero relationships, I am likely not your guy...
You should message me if
Be bold.
More
The two of us
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