I identify strongly with hedgehogs, porcupines, Toby Ziegler, Ruby (of Ruby and Sapphire) and other small things with strong outer defenses and a soft cuddly underbelly. I believe in a strong public sector, that love is a thing that expands the more you use it, and that black lives matter. I distrust unexamined motives, unregulated markets, and under-seasoned food. there are other things I believe in, but I'm trying, though obviously not trying very hard, to keep this pithy.
I identify as agender; what agender (as opposed to bigender or pangender) means to me (today) is that I'm a little bit of one and a little more of the other and carry trace elements of all but mostly I'm none at all. gender is a performance and I dislike singing for my supper. the traits I value in others and try to develop in myself (e.g. competence, compassion, resilience, vulnerability) don't carry gendered weight, they're just my go-to tools for navigating the world.
my point is: I am a catch.
keywords: nerdy; queer; enby/non-binary (they/them pronouns please); poly/solo poly/open
right now I mostly go to work and unpack boxes and make my house the way I want it to be, which has been made more difficult than expected due to the actions of rogue plumbers.
(people tell me I have pretty lips and eyelashes)
nb: we don't have to have all of these things in common, or even most of these things. I like what I like, but it's just stuff, it's not the hill I'll die on. I want to learn about new things from you, and I like it when you're open to learning about new things from me. it would probably help if you eat as indiscriminately as I eat and don't automatically count a book out if it's got an elf or a spaceship or a space elf on the cover, or a movie or TV show if it's animated or got subtitles.
books: Iain M. Banks; Jack Vance; Jo Walton; Ursula K. LeGuin; Lois McMaster Bujold; Catherynne M. Valente; Kim Newman; Sofia Samatar; my Goodreads;
comics: Love and Rockets; Usagi Yojimbo; King City; Multiple Warheads; Finder; Stray Bullets; Saga; Shutter; Ultimate Spider-Man (both Peter & Miles); the works of Jim Woodring; Percy Gloom; Transformers vs. G.I. Joe (no, really: I don't care for either of those things on their own, but this is a joyful psychedelic newsprint crayon scrawl Saturday morning cartoon of a book); Pluto (Urasawa x Tezuka); anything by Taiyo Matsumoto; the works of Evan Dahm;
movies: Better Off Dead; Jacob's Ladder; Pump Up The Volume; Bring It On; Pitch Perfect; Captain America (1 & 2); Chungking Express; Submarine;
shows: Kamen Rider Gaim; Kamen Rider Fourze; the West Wing; Steven Universe (see aforementioned ugly crying); Gravity Falls; Bravest Warriors; Bee & Puppycat; Penny Dreadful; The West Wing; Bob's Burgers; Mozart in the Jungle;
music: The Mountain Goats; Godspeed You! Black Emperor; Kate Bush; Carla Bozulich; Mogwai; Lush; Belle & Sebastian; Tom Waits; Nick Cave; PJ Harvey; Siouxsie Sioux; Wu-Tang; Mr. Lif; Asobi Seksu; Susanne Sundfør; wefunkradio.com; Back To Mine, LateNightTales, and other DJ lounge-type mixes; vintage WHFS bootlegs; my Last.fm;
food: Korean; Japanese; Ethiopian; Indian; Chinese; Vietnamese; Thai; Mediterranean; Middle Eastern; I'm experimenting with going vegetarian/vegan with a side of meat, but really I'm joyously omnivorous, and even the things I don't like I try to try a couple few times before I decide whether or not I like it. even if I don't like it in the end, I get a good idea of why people appreciate it. except for aspic. I don't understand aspic, at all.
games: Tokaido; Lords of Waterdeep and other worker placement games; 13th Age (my D&D of choice); Over the Edge; Legend of Zelda; Chrono Trigger; Civilization; Alpha Centauri; Don't Starve; FTL; UnReal World; Saints Row (3 & 4); XCOM; Epic Spell Wars of the Battle Wizards: Duel at Mt. Skullzfyre; Monster Hunter 4 Ultimate; Castlevania: Symphony of the Night and the other IGA-produced Castlevanias; the criminally (lol) unsung Yakuza series;
podcasts: Selected Shorts; Ken and Robin Talk About Stuff; Welcome to Night Vale;
some things I'm gonna judge you for: Ayn Rand; the Big Bang Theory; "everything except rap and country"; non-medical aversion to vegetables; I'm-not-feminist-because-I-believe-in-equality; #gamergate
books with elves, spaceships, or space elves;
the option of a proper command line;
wet wipes, tbh
(but not all at once);
how to live more gently in an increasingly hostile world;
how do I gender (specifically, how do I agender);
games of many kinds (though I stg I'm not A Gamer);
self-assertion as an act of vulnerability;
vulnerability as an act of self-assertion;
being single & non-monogamous at an age where many of my contemporaries, even non-monogamous contemporaries, have paired off. you wouldn't think "side piece in perpetuity" to look at me, and yet. (not that I'm not eminently qualified for the position.)
I don't know how to celebrate holidays, including my own birthday;
I have never eaten a chocodile, and now it seems unlikely that I ever will;
there is a reference to another website in this profile, and while that website is, itself, highly problematic, if you get the reference, it may be indicative of some of my predilections. I deleted my account, though;
my name sans hyphen dot tumblr dot com, the content of which is also indicative of some of my predilictions;
shrooms changed/saved my life once, but only once (the other times were mostly unmemorable);
I live with and help care for a dear friend (nb: not a romantic or sexual partner) who has chronic pain/fatigue issues and literally no other means of support. she can't work and has to go to a lot of doctors. SSI disability case pending. this doesn't mean I can't go do fun stuff ever, but it does mean I have unavoidable time commitments that take top priority, much like having a disabled romantic partner or disabled adult child. fortunately, these commitments are usually during business hours, but please consider carefully whether or not this is going to be a problem for you;
on some days -- good days -- my socks and underwear match.
your relationship timeline resembles a fractal or, at the very least, the Caves of Chaos or other old-school dungeon map;
same for your relationship hierarchy;
you're in town for a few days and you want to nerd it up over fancy drinks and see where it goes;
your idea of an excellent first (and frequent subsequent) date involves lots of small plates, thrifting, and/or bookstores;
you're broke or frugal and you want to hang out, get some delivery or takeout, watch movies &/or tv, and play tabletop &/or video games;
you believe that existence is naturally unfair and thus have little to no interest in preserving nature or acting naturally in that respect;
you have chocodiles and are willing to share;
you like the idea of being commitment-phobic together;
you want a new favorite side piece;
you want a mix tape.
keywords: nerdy; queer; femme; androgynous; enby/non-binary; solo poly; chocodiles
(I dislike putting this in my profile because I dislike reading it in others', but this isn't a paid account more than maybe one month out of the year, so I'm not going to see if you "liked" my profile for at least six months after you do it, most likely. so you should probably message me if you want to talk to me, or show appreciation for my top-notch content generation, and I promise I won't take it as an implicit invitation to show you my junk.)