Take this test

Their result for The Comprehensive Douchebag Test ...

Not That Bad

19% Dishonest, 7% Arrogant, 24% Immature, 11% Immoral, 24% Fratty, 0% Perverted, 15% Controlling, 24% Sexist

You could be worse.  You didn't score high enough on anything to show yourself to be a total jackass, so there's that.  You also didn't score low enough on anything to earn the title of "Good Guy".  It's safe to say you're a decent human being, but you still have some progress to be made when it comes to dating.

Their Analysis (Vertical line = Average)

  • Dishonest Distribution

    They scored 19% on Dishonest, higher than 48% of your peers.

  • Immature Distribution

    They scored 24% on Immature, higher than 38% of your peers.

  • Arrogant Distribution

    They scored 7% on Arrogant, higher than 16% of your peers.

  • Perverted Distribution

    They scored 0% on Perverted, higher than 21% of your peers.

  • Immoral Distribution

    They scored 11% on Immoral, higher than 35% of your peers.

  • Fratty Distribution

    They scored 24% on Fratty, higher than 49% of your peers.

  • Sexist Distribution

    They scored 24% on Sexist, higher than 68% of your peers.

  • Shallow Distribution

    They scored 13% on Shallow, higher than 37% of your peers.

  • Selfish Distribution

    They scored 0% on Selfish, higher than 7% of your peers.

  • Controlling Distribution

    They scored 15% on Controlling, higher than 78% of your peers.

All possible test results

A Truly Good Guy

You're humble, honest, mature, intelligent and kind--the perfect package!  I'm wondering why you even took this test.  Clearly you're a great guy and are just really bored.  Next time a wom... Read more

The Mega Douche

Congratulations!  There is literally everything wrong with you.  In fact, you're such an asshole, that you'd be better off sequestered on a faraway island, away from all women.   Read more

The Big Baby

The good news is, you're not a bad guy.  The bad news is, you're a complete child.  You have a moral center, and a relatively accurate view of women, but for some reason you just act like a kid.  O... Read more

Christian Grey

I would tell you to stop being such a dick, except for the fact that your personality is essentially identical to Christian Grey, one of the biggest imaginary heartthrobs in literature.  So, continue... Read more

You Should Know Better

The one good thing about you is that you're relatively mature--so you really have no excuse for your behavior.  You lie to women, cheat on them, and disrespect them, but other than that, you have a v... Read more

Generic Douche-cano

Congratulations!  You're a total douche.  Don't worry, you could be a bigger douche than this, but you're still pretty bad. Generally, you're immature, shallow, selfish, and just ... Read more

Satan's Butthole

Your main fault is that you just have no moral compass.  You consistently do the wrong thing, not because you don't know better, but because you're a terrible human being.  You're selfish and rude, ... Read more

Dangerous Maury Boyfriend

Because you scored so high in the "Controlling" and "Sexist" departments, it's safe to say there needs to be an episode on Maury where a seven-foot-tall drill seargent yells at you and then forces you... Read more

The Frat Boy

Your primary problems are that you're immature and still act like you're in college.  You love drinking, partying, and you're not really ready for a relationship.  You're not shallow or rude--in ... Read more

The Giggity

You're...kind of perverted.  By that, I don't mean that you're kinky, or good in bed, or "a freak" but rather that you're the kind of person who lurks under stairwells hoping to look up women's sk... Read more

The Sexist Pig

You may think you're a good guy, but unfortunately for you, we aren't living in 1916.  We're living in the real world, where women actually expect to be taken seriously- such a droll thought, isn'... Read more

Pants on Fire

Your issue?  You lie all the damn time.  Women just can't trust you, and they have good reason for it.  Most likely, this is because you're A.) an asshole or B.) too scared to tell the truth. ... Read more

Shallow Hal

Because you scored $(Shallow) in the "shallow" category, it's safe to say you're a pretty shallow guy.  You're probably one of those dudes who needs women to weigh 90 pounds, but also wants them to w... Read more

You're So Vain

You may not be a bad guy, but you're just so completely arrogant that you still count as a douche.  You are the point where high confidence verges over into "fucking annoying" territory.  Without... Read more


Meh, you're annoying.  Your biggest fault is being immature and shallow, but you could be a lot worse.  Most women probably have no idea you're a jerk, and they probably still date you and then get ... Read more

Not That Bad

You could be worse.  You didn't score high enough on anything to show yourself to be a total jackass, so there's that.  You also didn't score low enough on anything to earn the title of "Good Guy". ... Read more

Take this test »

More tests we think you'll like

More Top Tests