You are the ZOMBIE FLAMINGO. Brightly colored, sinister, spectacular, and absolutely no threat whatsoever to anything. Not even to the brine shrimp that are flamingos' usual diet-- your digestive system and tongue were the first things to rot. But hey, at least you're still walking around and smelling bad-- that's SOMETHING.
SEEK: the shallow. AVOID: gardeners, priests, and anyone carrying a cricket bat, golf club, shovel, or baseball bat.
Links to all the VPI categories: Curious Bloodstain, Cuckoo's Nestmate, Meaningless Advice, Second From the Left, Quiet Horror, Naked Mole Rat, Iceberg Hidden in the Fog, Incomplete Tarot Deck, Dead Houseplant, Mistuned TV, Burned Out, Zombie Flamingo, Nurse Shark, Paper Cup, Lamprey, Pyroclastic Flow, Cassandra, Sphinx, Futility, Coleocanth, The Star! (MV), Swamp Island, PANIC!!1!, Lone Freeway Shoe, Bad Tattoo, Unnecessary Heimlich Maneuver, Illegible Warning.
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