Take this test

Top Gun

I feel the need, the need for speed.

Truly an homage to the eighties. You combine a horrible synth-pop soundtrack with clever banter, thrilling action sequences, plenty of romance, a really gay beach volleyball scene, and Tom Fucking Skerritt. All hail the master of 80s cinematic schlock.

All possible test results

Raiders... Lost Ark

If you don't go to the movies - you won't see...Yeah, you had a pretty lame tagline, but who needs clever marketing when you've got Harrison Ford, Nazis, and the baddest bullwhip ever? Read more

Lethal Weapon

If these two can learn to stand each other... the bad guys don't stand a chance.You're conflicted. Part of you wants to go by the book, and happens to be too old for this shit. But the other... Read more


You're a pretty good follow-up to a really great film. Full of action, adventure, sci-fi, and plenty of kicking ass. Read more

Back To The Future

He's the only kid ever to get into trouble before he was born.It's hard to find anything bad to say about you, you're a near-perfect movie which spawned some pretty awesome sequels, as well. Read more


The secret contest where the world's greatest warriors fight in a battle to the death.You're a well-kept secret. This may be because you're far too cool for everyone to know about all at once... Read more

Blade Runner

Man Has Made His Match... Now It's His ProblemYou're a classic film by one of the world's greatest directors, made at the top of his game. Few are sure what to make of you - when they think y... Read more

Road House

The dancing's over. Now it gets dirty.See what they did there? They referenced "Dirty Dancing." Whatever, you beat people up with a pool cue. Fuck the haters. Read more

The Delta Force

They don't negotiate with terrorists... they blow them away!Look. You've got Chuck Norris and Lee Marvin coursing through your veins. And not "Paint Your Wagon" Lee Marvin, neither. No. No... Read more

Mad Max Thunderdome

Two men enter. One man leaves.You have a whole lotta Tina Turner in you. Depending on your gender, you're either really fierce or totally gay. Read more


He fought his first battle on the Scottish Highlands in 1536. He will fight his greatest battle on the streets of New York City in 1986. His name is Connor MacLeod. He is immortal.You kick ass... Read more

Iron Eagle

Break the sound barrier. Break the speed barrier.There's really not very much about you that's good. You're derivative; a cheap knockoff. But you do have Larry B. Scott (Lamar from Reven... Read more


If it bleeds, we can kill it...Did you feel goosebumps reading that? I felt goosebumps. Read more

Conan the Barbarian

He conquered an empire with his sword. She conquered HIM with her bare hands.Yeah, you're kinda lame and potentially homoerotic, but you know what? You still kick ass. Read more

Top Gun

I feel the need, the need for speed.Truly an homage to the eighties. You combine a horrible synth-pop soundtrack with clever banter, thrilling action sequences, plenty of romance, a really ga... Read more


Somewhere... somehow... someone's going to pay! Oh shit! Tell me you didn't get a little bit of wood reading that tagline. Unless you're a chick; then you probably got a LOT of wood reading ... Read more


What most people call hell, he calls home.You got a mullet, a death wish, and a real bad attitude. You're my worst nightmare. Oh boy, lots of folks are gonna die! Read more

Rocky IV

He's facing the ultimate challenge. And fighting for his life.You know what? You may not be everyone's cup of tea, but I don't care what they say - you rule. Plus, you will break them. Read more

Red Dawn

A full scale military invasion by foreign troops begins. Total surprise. Almost total success.Almost! Butcha know why it wasn't? Because you're a sweet cadre of high schoolers with guns 'n s... Read more

The Beastmaster

There's really nothing to describe. You may be mediocre, but you keep on kicking ass regardless. Read more

48 Hrs.

When a tough cop has a cool convict as a partner and 48 hrs to catch a killer, a lot of funny things can happen in . . . 48 HRS.You somehow manage to kick quite a bit of ass while making peopl... Read more


Part man. Part machine. All cop. The future of law enforcement.Ooooh... I'd buy you for a dollar! Read more

Action Jackson

NAME: Jericho Jackson NICKNAME: "Action"HOME: Detroit PROFESSION: Cop EDUCATION: Harvard Law HOBBY: Fighting Crime WEAPON: You're looking at 'em Read more

Above The Law

He was a covert agent trained in Vietnam. He has a master 6th degree black belt in Aikido... and family in the Mafia. He's a cop with an attitude.Oh yeah, you're pretty much a badass. Read more

The Terminator

In the Year of Darkness, 2029, the rulers of this planet devised the ultimate plan. They would reshape the Future by changing the Past. The plan required something that felt no pity. No pain. No fear.... Read more

Beverly Hills Cop

In Detroit a cop learns to take the heat. In L.A. he learns to keep his cool.You're funny, kickass, and not very lame at all. Read more

Die Hard

It will blow you through the back wall of the theater!I think that's a good thing. Stop blowing people through the theatre, and keep kicking ass. Read more

Escape From New York

The world's greatest leader is a hostage in the most dangerous place on Earth. Now only the deadliest man alive can save him.I'm not sure what that says about you, but you kick an awful lot of... Read more

Take this test »

More tests we think you'll like

More Top Tests