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  • I have four cats. Sometimes I think that's four too many, but really, it isn't. It's exactly ONE too many.

    Somebody has to go.

    The only question is which specific cat will be donating a comfy new pair of fuzzy house slippers for my collection.

    I just can't decide, so I'm leaving it up to you, the OkCupid community. Which of my furry buddies quits taking catnaps and starts taking dirtnaps? Who will get his or her face sawn off with a plastic butter knife?

    You decide.

    I've tried to make this test as even-handed as possible, with information, both pro and con, that will help you in your momentous decision.

    It's your chance to play god.

    Don't fuck it up.

    *Note* My first attempt at this test, the "Which Cat Shall I Murder" test, was killed by an OkC bug. But this one is new and improved: This time I'll be testing you on two variables. One, of course, will be which cat should ultimately die, and the other will determine how awful that death will be.

  • No cats will be murdered as a result of this test. If, knowing that, you still can't stand the idea, you'd probably be happier here.